Les Pensées de Catherine

Hope in the empty tomb

2010-05-12T12:05:00.001-07:00

“Just because the tomb is empty doesn’t mean your life has to be.” That is the phrase a pastor friend used to end his Easter sermon. These words have been rattling in my heart and brain ever since I have heard them. I guess I have been thinking about this a lot lately because I have been with some of our church families recently as they said goodbye to their loved ones.

These times remind me acutely again of how short life is and how very fast it goes. This one sentence seems to me to go very well with what I am reading now.
I am reading Thomas A Kempis’ “Imitation of Christ” as part of my daily devotion time. This is a neat little book – a devotional classics - written by a 14th century German monk. It reads a little like the book of Proverbs. Great wisdom to be found there. The book is divided into four “books” covering various aspects of the spiritual life. In the first “book”, there is a short chapter called “Meditation on death” (chapter 23.) Certain sentences leaped from the page for me and made me stop and think:

“What good is a long life if we do not use it to advance spiritually?” “Many count the years of their conversion, but often there is little to show for it.”
“How happy and wise are those who try now to become what they would want to be at the hour of death.”
“Time is precious now, and now is the day of salvation, the acceptable time. But alas, that you spend the time so unprofitably! The time will come when you will wish that you had one more day – even one hour – to put your life in order, but there is no assurance that you will get it.”

“Attend to those things that are to God’s honor and glory. Honor the Saints and follow their example and you will have friends waiting ‘to receive you into everlasting dwellings’ (Luke 16:9) when you life here is ended.”

Easter is a time to not only remember that the tomb was empty but that it is empty still and for us this means Life! Not only Life on the other side of Heaven but Life here and now! In his life, death and resurrection Jesus is calling us to Life abundant. A life of service and giving of ourselves to others…

Do you have some things you need to attend to? Someone to forgive or ask forgiveness from? Some unhealed placed in your heart? Is there someone who needs to hear that you love them? Who needs to see that you love them?
How is your soul? What’s going on with you and Jesus?

Stories of our lives

2010-01-29T12:09:00.000-08:00

This article was written for our February issue of our church newsletter, the Beacon.

I have been thinking about stories a lot lately. Actually I think about stories pretty much all the time. I think this is because I am a pastor and a preacher and I make my living in part by telling stories, stories of the Bible in particular. But I don’t tell stories just to tell stories, I tell stories in order to help folks (including myself) come to know God, through Jesus, better and hopefully help them form an enduring relationship with Him. That is how I came to belief in Christ and how I became and, am becoming still a follower, because folks have told me stories of Jesus. But also, and maybe most importantly, I came to faith because, not only did I hear the stories, but I saw the folks who told me those stories, actually live them out. These people were my grandmothers, a few pastors, certain people in my small groups at church, etc… We usually never come to faith on our own, but instead through people and stories.

We are all surrounded by stories. Our lives are a series of stories. Some are good stories and some are not so good stories. When we adopt not so good stories and allow them somehow to dominate our life (not usually consciously at first), we often get in trouble. There is a form of psychotherapy called “narrative therapy”. I am not a trained psychotherapist but it seems to me that some of the stories we believe and follow really have a negative impact in our lives. I am pretty sure we all have some of those stories in our lives – some have been spoken out loud and some have been somehow “understood” without being verbalized. Some of us have heard, “you are stupid”, “you are fat”, “you’ll never amount to anything” etc… early on and we still live with that deeply hurtful legacy. It often translates in an almost “self-prophesied” way” “I am stupid therefore I am helpless and nothing in my life is good and nothing in my life will ever change…” type scenario… I have seen a few folks coming to the church office to talk with me who seemed to live out this scenario. They remained in life-draining, abusive situation and nothing I offered - which from my standpoint could help – made a difference. They seemed to expect me to change their circumstances without any change or involvement on their part.

Jesus confronted a man who seemed to live out this “helpless scenario” in John 5:1-15. I love Jesus because he cuts to the chase. He tells the man stuck on the edge of the pool: “Do you want to get well?”

Not only some people live out negative stories but organizations – churches - do also. Churches – these communal organisms, these groupings of people, adopt negative stories which they end up living by – we are too old, too small, too this or not enough that – with predictable results of decline and even death. “Do you want to get well?” Jesus asks.

What I want to tell you, to remind you of – if you are stuck in a negative, sad, story, which saps the life and joy out of you - is that Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life (John 14:6). He came so that we could have abundant life (John 10:10) and he can help you rewrite your story and get unstuck. Trust in Him and give Him your life! And really follow Him!

The practice of the presence of God

2010-01-26T15:25:00.000-08:00

This originally was written for our January 2010 newsletter

There is a magnet on the metal file cabinet in my church office that I had never really paid attention to. It was there when I was appointed to Bethel.
I noticed it last week when I was sitting at my computer, looking around the office, out the window and as I was trying to slow down a bit to catch my breath. The last few weeks have been going at “warp speed” (if you are a Star Trek fan you know what that means.)

The magnet reads,
“Every Day, Find a Way, Practice the Presence of God”

This magnet reminded me of a classic devotional book bearing the same name, “The Practice of the Presence of God” which was compiled from conversations and letters, after Brother Lawrence died.

"My most usual method is this simple attention, an affectionate regard for God to whom I find myself often attached with greater sweetness and delight than that of an infant at the mother's breast. To choose an expression, I would call this state the bosom of God, for the inexpressible sweetness which I taste and experience there." This is how "Brother Lawrence" describes his constant practice of speaking with and reflecting upon God amidst the mundane tasks of life. Nicholas Herman (c. 1605-1691) was born in Lorraine, France, and served as a cook and shoe repairer at a Carmelite monastery. He was only a lay member of the order, and walked with a limp from injuries incurred as a soldier, yet his private thoughts provide a wellspring of devotional insight and refreshment.”

“His method was to cultivate at all times a consciousness of the presence of God. According to Brother Lawrence, wherever we might find ourselves, whatever the task at hand, we should perform our duties with a consciousness of God’s loving presence. With such an awareness all our activities were hallowed; we would thus find ourselves in a state of continuous prayer or conversation with God… Brother Lawrence made no distinction between great works and small. As he liked to observe, God, ‘regards not the greatness of the work, but the love with which it is performed.”

I don’t usually make New Year resolution because by February, they usually peter out but my wish for all of us would be that we would cultivate “the practice of the presence of God”, that we would be ever more mindful that God is with us always. In order to do this, I believe we need to hear/feel God. For more introverted persons like me, this means I need to slow down (Elijah heard God in the still small voice - a gentle whisper - not in the wind or the earthquake or the fire – 1 Kings 19:11-13); for the more extroverted among us, this may mean something else but I suspect we all need to slow down daily. I believe that without this awareness we will not follow God’s guidance well because we won’t know what that guidance is.
May we be ever more open to God’s guidance this year, not only as individuals but as a whole church.

Annual Conference

2009-07-01T18:36:00.000-07:00

Angie Hartman, our lay delegate to Annual Conference, and I participated in a historic event this past week: The first Annual Conference of the New Indiana Conference. (You might wonder about the meaning of the word Conference and why it is used differently in this same sentence. Annual Conference is a yearly event bringing together both lay and clergy delegates to work on the business of the Church but also to worship together and have fellowship. The New Indiana Conference is a geographical area, encompassing what were formerly the North and South Indiana Conferences. As you have read above in Dan’s article, the districts lines have also been redrawn. The Michiana District and parts of other districts will now be known as the North District. This North District is comprised of the counties of Lake, Porter, LaPorte, St. Joseph, Elkhart, Marshall (except Culver Emmanuel, Poplar Grove, Santa Anna, Richland Center, and Burton), Kosciusko (except for Pierceton, Morris Chapel, Packerton, Center, Mentone, Burkett, Akron, Beaver Dam, and Talma), plus DeMotte from Jasper County.

Our first Annual Conference of the New Indiana Conference also took place in a new location. For years, we had gathered at Purdue University in West Lafayette. This year, and probably for the next couple of years at least, we gathered at Ball State University in Muncie.
Because of the coming together of two geographical Conference areas, the number of delegates basically doubled at over 2000. I don’t recall the exact number which was given to us by the Bishop on the first day. That large number of delegates combined with a new, unfamiliar – at least for me – location was interesting. Needless to say that if you need to find someone, you better have their cell phone number, in order to get hold of them and set a meeting place.

We did conduct the business of the church but for me the best part of Annual Conference is the worship and preaching, fellowship and ordination service. Have you ever heard “O for a Thousand Tongue to Sing” sang by over 2000 people? Pretty cool! The praise team did a great job. I guess I am biased too because I have some friends singing in it. We heard good speakers, in Rev. Adam Hamilton and Rev. David Bell and a thoughtful ordination message from our Bishop Mike Coyner. He called it “Finish the Song”. It was a reminder that we are serving together and that when someone is in trouble, we are called to help them “finish the song” by supporting them and loving them. We should be in ministry serving together not as isolated as too many are.

I got to see pastor friends I had not seen in a long time because they are appointed pretty far from here. I shared a room with a good friend who was ordained this year. I remembered my ordination last year too but I think I was more excited about her being ordained than I was at my own ordination. Go figure…

I wrote briefly about community in our June newsletter. What I experienced at Annual Conference was community. A gathering of all kind of folks, different folks, with the same love for Jesus and desire to see His Kingdom grow here as it is in Heaven. Community is not always neat; it can be a little chaotic and messy but we are still the Body that Jesus has commissioned to do His work. We are a bunch of goofs and some would snicker that if we are the ones Jesus has commissioned to do His work, we are in deep trouble. In view of the declining membership of our churches and the fact that we are not reaching unchurched population as effectively as what Jesus calls us to, one could believe that but Jesus is clear that we are the ones. Someone said that we are the ones we have been waiting for. Indeed. No others are coming. We’re it! May the Spirit continue to grant us power and boldness for the task at hand! May we be known by our love and not our division.

Community

2009-07-01T18:29:00.000-07:00

Community. I have been thinking quite a bit about community recently. True community is hard to come by in our society yet it is what we were designed for. We were never meant to do life alone. We see this early on in Genesis, when God creates everything including man. It is very soon apparent that something is missing. God says, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (Gen. 2:18) We were created for community because God is a community God. He is, after all, a triune God: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. We were created for community and we all need community.

I think of community because we celebrated the day of Pentecost on May 31. Pentecost Sunday is the final Sunday of Easter. We celebrate Pentecost (see Acts 2) as the “birth” of the Church – this corporate faith community. The Church emerges - out of a frightened band of followers - after the resurrection of Jesus and after he goes back to Heaven (celebrated on Ascension day). The Holy Spirit who comes forms the church by making the Risen Christ manifest in power.

The church is a community called together by the Spirit of the Risen One. As such, it is different than other “organizations” such as the Rotary or Kiwanis for example. “The Greek word for church (ekklesia, from which we derive “ecclesiastical” means “those who have been called forth or summoned, much as one is summoned to appear in a court of law. And we are called as a body of interdependent parts, not as separable individuals (see 1 Corinthians 12:4-31)… Participation therefore is not something we do on the basis of personal choice or need; participation in the Body of Christ is inherent in being Christian… Therefore Christians participate in the church not so much for what they can get as for what they can give, for what they can offer as an alternative to the dominant ways of the world.”

Our society tends to isolate us more and more. Families are distant, geographically and too often emotionally. People move quite a bit. We seldom know our neighbors. Isolation and loneliness are rampant.

I believe that what the church – at its best - can offer is a community that cannot be found outside of it: A community which points to Jesus, as the source of everything; a community where love and forgiveness and healing can be found in the midst of the craziness of this world; a community which worships the God who gives purpose and meaning to life; the God of our salvation.

I hope and pray that we are – that we can be - that kind of church.

Surprising Grace

2009-06-09T16:18:00.000-07:00

There are moments in life when hard stuff seems to come in bunches. These past few weeks have been like this. Our church is facing challenges. Then health stuff in the form of stomach flu for Steve and I and then the worst sinus infection/cold that I ever remember getting for me, requiring antibiotics, which I am still on. I am usually never sick. Is that God’s way of saying it is time for a vacation?

This week-end we were in the Columbus, Ohio, area for me to do our 21 year old niece Jennifer’s gravesite service. She dropped dead with no warning on Steve’s birthday 1/29. I officiated at her funeral on 2/4 and the family asked me to come back on 6/6to commit her ashes, along with her dad’s ashes. Dwight, Steve’s older brother, died of cancer 10 years ago on Easter Sunday and his wife’ Carol had held on to his ashes until then. His birthday was on 6/5. Carol felt she was now ready to let go, so that we could bury Dwight’s ashes along with Jennifer’s. We got to the cemetery in Pataskala Saturday late morning, with a bunch of family and friends gathered, only to find out that nothing was ready. The plot was not marked. There was no hole dug and no one from the funeral home or the cemetery to greet us. Inquiring phone calls remained fruitless till after we decided to proceed, hole or no hole. After the service we found out that a miscommunication had occurred and that the funeral home/cemetery had us down for July 6 instead of June 6! Carol had to go home with the urn that day. Not the way it was supposed to be…

Then on Sunday morning I find a voice mail on my cell phone from the husband of Sara, our church secretary, announcing that she had died in her sleep during the night. She had just had cancer surgery over the Memorial Day week-end. We had all thought that things had gone well. So well in fact that Sara said she felt good and she wanted to come back to work! And she did for a couple of days against my better counsel.

Several weeks back, we got a call from the new owners of Steve’s boyhood home in Pickerington, OH. They had tracked us down through the internet and wanted to hear more about the house and stories associated with it. Since we were going to be nearby for the gravesite service, Steve told them we could stop by. They invited us to an early dinner at 2 pm.

Frankly, visiting these folks, Sunday afternoon, after hearing about Sara’s death and still battling this sinus infection/cold was the last thing I wanted to do. But Steve was so excited at the prospect of seeing the inside of the house he had lived in from age 5 till he graduated from High School in 1973, and sharing with these people and seeing what they had/were going to do to the house, that I did not want to disappoint him and I decided that staying away mopping would not help anybody anyway.

This is when God’s grace totally blew me – us - away. We had stopped by Home Depot to pick up a planter to bring with us as a gift.

I carried the plant with me and as soon as our hostess opened the door, she greeted us by hugging us and proceeded to talk to us as if we had been friends forever. While I was surprised at getting hugged by a total stranger, there was nothing forced about any of it and she made us feel like family. No airs, no pretense, just genuine friendliness.

Steve’s youngest brother and his wife and 9 years old daughter had been invited too and they joined us shortly thereafter. They were greeted in the same warm manner. Steve and I had thought of only staying just long enough to not be rude and his brother Tom and family thought they would just come for a Coke. Next thing we know, we are helping set up the table outside on the patio and carrying food out and helping ourselves to some pop and ice tea. We all ended up staying till 8:30 pm that night and Jane and Sam (the new owners) acted like they were genuinely sorry to see us leave. We exchanged email addresses and phone no. and I do hope we stay in touch. I heard stories after stories of growing up and good times in this house and heard about what had changed and what had not. We walked all over the large backyard and along the creek at the back of the house. We saw every room in the house. Jane and Sam and their 15 years old daughter Sophie were the most hospitable folks I ever remember meeting. We found out common interests etc. Several of us mentioned afterward that this was in fact a God thing. It felt that way as we were visiting and eating great food – the best homemade chocolate cake! - and enjoyed gracious, unforced company. Turns out Jane and Sam are Christians, Catholics. But not overbearing just genuinely caring folks. She is a former teacher, turned nurse. He has a long title I can’t recall but it has to do with medical research.

The company, the great food, the memories shared felt like a healing balm and a Godly embrace. It was as God were saying, “I know that things have been a little rough lately but I am here and I love you. You will be OK.”

Stuck in my head

2009-06-01T17:12:00.000-07:00

I have a tendency to get stuck in my head. If I am not careful I can get overly cerebral. I want to analyze stuff too much at times. I find myself doing this in times of stress in particular. I get very physically and mentally active and I retreat in my head and I stuff my emotions. God stopped me in my tracks with that this week. It took an image in a devotional publication that I love called Alive Now. It is a publication of the Upper Room which helps me surrender to God and helps me get out of my head. The May/June issue is written by the folks, both clergy and lay, from our Indiana Conference. Deals with change and the difficulty of change and the resource we have in God. On page 17 there is a picture of cracked rocks and from the cracks come out green leaves and tiny purple flowers. I found myself with tears in my eyes looking at this picture. I was surprised by that. Again, I started asking myself why I felt that way and I started analyzing: Let’s see, I feel this way because this picture reminds me that in the dry moments of our lives, God can bring life. Well, this picture looks like something out of the parable of the sower… Stop! Get out of your head! Receive the picture as a gift to be cherished. Just let your heart be touched. Yeah… Thanks God.

Oh, another way I get out of my head is by reading Calvin and Hobbes. Why do we always have to be so grown-up and responsible!

PS: The picture herewith is not the picture in Alive Now but it is something like that.

Friendship and Grace

2009-06-01T16:33:00.000-07:00

Friendship is a gift and grace is undeserved love. I have been on the receiving end of both love and grace, especially these past two weeks. A friend is someone who loves you even when you don’t feel like you deserve it and when you are weird. People who know me best probably would say I am weird all the time. My significant other tells me that – in all fun and love.
God showed up through a couple of friends recently when I really needed to hear I am loved even when I am weird. You guys know who you are. Thanks. Love you back.

Do you have someone in your life who loves you like that?

Comfort in rough times

2009-05-05T16:18:00.000-07:00

Printed in our May church newsletter

I was sitting at a local Body Shop this week waiting for the folks there to reinstall a strip on one of the doors of my car. Several weeks ago my car was damaged while parked as I was grocery shopping. I found the other driver. We talked. Turns out she remembered me from a funeral I had officiated at for a relative. Small world. Finally we got things resolved through her insurance company and mine.
While sitting there waiting for my car to be serviced, I pulled my Bible and a little pocket prayer book from Upper Room that I have had for several years. The cover reads, “Prayers for Courage-Words of Faith for Difficult Times.” (May-June 2003 Extra Issue.) I began to read these prayers. Several “jumped” at me.

The Lord is my Light and my Salvation; Whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? (Psalm 27:1)

When I am afraid, I will trust in you. (Psalm 56:3)

Thus says the LORD, He who created you, O Jacob, He who formed you, O Israel:
Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers; they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the LORD your God. (Isaiah 43:1-3)

Why am I sharing this with you? We have been facing some rough times, especially these past few months. This economic recession we are going through has hit most of us pretty hard, at some level. Folks talk with me; call me or email me; ask for prayer. Times are uncertain; I hear questions of “end times” in Sunday School; jobs are jeopardized or have ended… Money is tight. It’s not only jobs and moneyI hear about: Marriages or other relationships are rocky; health is failing for many of us…
Life has a way of bringing us face to face with the fact that things never remain the same; earthly things are temporary. We don’t have any control over most things. All these are sources of anxiety. But we have one thing that we can control and that is how we react and respond when we feel anxious and scared.

We just celebrated Easter. We talked about the Easter power that is made available to us through the Holy Spirit. We talked about the fact that we are empty-tomb people and the fact that Jesus was raised from the dead and this means Hope and Life for his followers. So we can claim this Power, this Hope, this Life or we can let fear paralyze us into despair and inaction.

Old timers, who remember the Great Depression of the 1930’s and remember World War II, remind us that “this too shall pass.” It is a call for us to remember what is important and to whom we look for strength and courage.
Perspective: Jesus said, “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” (Matthew 6:19-21) Where is our heart?

The thing about fear, if we let it control us, is that it can make us inward-looking people: We can start worrying so much about ourselves and our well-being that we become blind and uncaring about the people and needs around us. We can forget the track record that God has with His people – us – we can forget the promises offered in the Bible and we can forget to be the Church.
These are testing times for sure. How will we respond to fear and seemingly endless needs?
Will we be the Church?

We have many opportunities to be the Church. One such opportunity will happen on May 9 as United Way and the Post-office - partnering with areas churches and Church Community Services and other local food pantries – have their annual mail-carrier food drive to gather a lot of food for people who are hungry. Before that day, you will receive an empty grocery bag to take home and fill up to capacity. Further instructions are forthcoming about this.

“All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of his possessions was his own, but they shared everything they had. With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and much grace was upon them all. There was no needy persons among them.” (Acts 4:32-34)

As the hymn says, “The church is not a building, the church is not a steeple, the church is not a resting place, the church is a people. We are the Church” (UMH 558)

Let it be so!

Our Life Together - Holy Friendship

2009-04-25T13:33:00.000-07:00

I attended our yearly Life Together clergy conference at St. Luke’s UMC Indianapolis this past Monday and Tuesday. The theme this year was Holy Friendship. We heard presentation from Bishop Janice Huie of the Texas Conference and her experience of bringing together two separate conferences. Since we are in process of bringing the North and South Indiana conferences together, this was interesting.
Matt Bloom (husband of Kim Bloom, associate pastor at SB Clay UMC – and associate professor of Management at Notre Dame) reported on surveys results which we were asked to fill out online in regards to what makes our work as clergy fulfilling and meaningful. In a very small nutshell, what I got out of these survey results – which are still being processed and looked at - is that there is a great passion for service among our clergy but also a sense of discouragement and loneliness were very much present. Being in a pastor in our day and time is much more challenging than it used to be. Long hours and comparatively small pay (for pastors with a Masters’ degree when compared with other professions requiring Masters’ degree) is a source of frustration for many.

Dr. Joyce Moore, associate Dean for the Center for Lifelong Learning at Duke Divinity School talked about this sense of community we all need.

Current Calumet DS Michelle Cobb briefly talked about an upcoming Clergy Wellness program, which will partly be underwritten by a Lilly Foundation grant to help with increasing the mental and physical health of pastors and decrease the sense of isolation among us. More accountability will also apparently be required. I do not have any more details about this at this time.

Lastly we laughed with Mishawaka comedian Craig Tornquist who had already made us laugh at our last Michiana district Christmas party.

We hear interesting people at these kinds of gatherings. The worship was good: More quiet and reflective on the first day and more upbeat the second morning. The last worship of the gathering, Tuesday afternoon, included communion which, for me, is always a moving moment. Seeing hundreds of pastors – some I know and whom are friends – come forward to receive the bread and juice is a powerful thing.

But I would say the most meaningful thing for me – not that these other things are not – is to see pastor friends I had not seen in a while. There was some free time Monday night and the group of pastors I was ordained with (minus of couple) gathered together at a local restaurant for dinner. It was great to see these people whom I have grown to love in the course of our ordination process together. Some I see more often because we serve the same district but some are geographically distant and we had not seen each other in months. Getting together was the highlight for me.
I also felt a great sense of belonging to something more important than me as we were together worshipping a great God. I am grateful.

Easter Power

2009-04-25T12:55:00.000-07:00

Acts 4:32-37 - Preached on 4/19/09 at Elkhart Bethel UMC

I love the season of Lent and Easter. That is my favorite time in our church liturgical calendar. In some ways, I like this time of year more than Christmas. I think that is one of the reasons I find myself a little disconcerted and a little sad when Easter day is over. For me, as a pastor, so much time and effort go into the preparation for these times in our liturgical calendar and then the season is quickly forgotten, it seems. The headlines read the same: Economic recession, wars, floods, earthquakes, diseases, death…Does Easter really change anything?

One could get discouraged but then I look at what happens after Easter. We read about this in the book of Acts. This is an amazing book that Luke wrote to tell us about God being at work in establishing the Church of Jesus Christ and its early progression. It is a great book which shows us the power of God and the growing pains as the Church gets birthed. We read of acts which display incredible, beautiful faith; actions which sadden God; the good things, the difficult things…

We have already witnessed incredible things happening: Can the death of Jesus and God raising him from the dead ever become routine?

Amazing things continue to happen. Do you remember Peter, who had denied Jesus three times when Jesus was doing through the most difficult time of his earthly life? The same Peter is now preaching a powerful message. Healings happen. Large numbers are converted.

Well, not everybody appreciates the convicting words and this resurrection thing is a definite stumbling block for many. Peter and John are arrested by the religious authorities and questioned. Peter and John are released unharmed for the authorities fear the people might riot.

Their release triggers an amazing prayer from the believers. They praise the mighty acts of God and ask for boldness in their proclamation of faith. And an incredible thing happens. We witness a second Pentecost of sorts. We are told that, “After this prayer, the building where they were meeting shook, and they were all filled with the Holy Spirit. And they preached God’s message with boldness.” (v. 4:31, NLT) Now, who said prayer does not do anything!

This brings us to our text for today. I have to be honest: I have resisted preaching on this passage. I had, up to now, always preached on the other Lectionary text of John 20:19-31 which deals with Jesus appearing, post-resurrection, to his disciples and the reaction of Thomas.

I am cool with the first verse. I read, “All the believers were of one heart and mind.” (v. 4:32a) and I find myself sitting up and leaning forward because I want to know more about that.
But then, I read the second part of verse 32, “They felt that what they owned was not their own. They shared everything they had.” And I find myself recoiling. This sound like living in a commune or communism or something. I like my stuff. I have some cool books and neat CDs and I am pretty possessive when it comes to my laptop. What do you mean “they shared everything? ”

I know what happens when I have shared before: I don’t get my stuff back or if it comes back, there are grease stains on the pages of my books and leftover crumbs from potato chips or other greasy snacks that were eaten by the reader stuck on the pages. The CDs have come back scratched with the case cracked. OK, I am exaggerating a little but I have had instances like that so I am a little reticent to let my stuff go. I ask for a security deposit and make a photocopy of the borrower’s driver’s license. 

It’s not just books and CDs, it’s big stuff the text talks about: “From time to time, those who owned lands or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales and put it at the apostles’ feet and it was distributed to anyone as he had need. (v. 4:34b-35, NIV – Not all versions of the Bible say “From time to time” by the way.)

This way of living was radical then but more so now in our so very individualistic and materialistic society.

God has been working with me and this text. I realize now that what I am reading about is the Easter power at work. This happened because the resurrection is true and God has sent His Spirit to us and His Spirit enables to think in ways and act in ways which would be really hard, if not impossible, for us to do on our own.

I believe that what God wants us to see is THE MARK OF A GREAT CHURCH:

1. UNITY: “All the believers were of one heart and mind” (v. 32) This does not mean that people, all of a sudden, lose their individuality and personality. What I believe this mean is that they are so in love with Jesus and so full of the Spirit, that what God wants becomes more important than what they want. We are called to be so full of the Spirit and so in love with Jesus, that our stuff does not take precedence over someone else’s needs. Giving is not mandatory but it happens out of love.

What would that look like for us to have that kind of unity, that kind of close-knit community?

“British author and theologian C.S. Lewis, wrote a classic, entitled, “The Screwtape Letters.” In it, he imagined Screwtape as being the Devil (or as he describes himself, “undersecretary of the department of temptation”) and his nephew, Wormwood, a “junior tempter” who had been assigned the responsibility of recruiting members for the Kingdom of Hell.
In one chapter, Screwtape is talking to Wormwood. He says, “you will find that the church is fertile soil. One of the best places to find recruits to Hell is in the church.”

Now here is his advice to Wormwood, “Keep them bickering over programs, procedures, money, organization, personal hurts, misgivings. Keep them bickering. Whatever you do, don’t let them see the banners wave, because if they ever see the banners wave, we’ve lost them forever.”

I think that what C.S. Lewis is saying is that the secret to carrying out the great commission of reaching out people for Jesus is that when our vision is fixed on Jesus, and we are so caught up in Him, we won’t have time to bicker. We won’t have time to worry about our little hurts. When we are caught up in carrying His banner to a lost and dying world then the church will march forward in triumph once again. ”

What would it look like for the millions of Christians on this earth to come together, regardless of denominations, to work for the greater good of the Kingdom of God?

On a much smaller scale, what would it look like for our cluster groups to work together? You should be aware by now that we have formed a cluster with Trinity, St. Paul, Calvary, Elkhart First, Jimtown and Hillcrest. We had our first meeting Saturday morning at Perkins. The turnout was pretty good and we spent over an hour getting to know one another. I was sitting by Don Reed the pastor at Elkhart First and facing a couple of his lay leaders. Except for St. Paul’s (Bill Hemmig is on vacation but they had a lay leader there) all the pastors showed up. We talked about the possibility of doing VBS together or maybe having a common men’s prayer group. Maybe a joint youth group. There are several possibilities. This is an initial meeting. This is something that cannot be only pastor lead. It is meant to be lay lead.

Maybe more unity can start at the grass root level through these cluster groups.

2. GENEROSITY: As I said earlier, v. 32b had caused me to pause and decide to preach on something else up to now.
Was Luke thinking like Karl Marx, linking every human attitude and action to an economic source? “No,” says William Willimon, the Alabama area Bishop of the UMC “Luke was not a Marxist, but he was enough of a realist to know that there is a good chance that where our possessions are, our hearts will be also.”

A surprisingly large amount of the book of Acts deals with economic issues within the community, just as much of Luke’s first volume, his gospel, deals with matters of money (consider the parables of the Debtors, the Good Samaritan, the Rich Fool, the Unjust Steward, the Rich Man and Lazarus and the Pounds. Wealth is not, for Luke, a sign of divine approval — it is a danger (William H. Willimon, Acts [Atlanta: John Knox Press, 1988], 52).

In a society which believed that wealth and good health was a sign of blessing from God, this generosity, displayed by some of the early Christians, was as radical then as it is now. They seem to have taken the command of Deuteronomy 15:4, “there should be no poor among you…” pretty seriously.
If we look at the story of the man born blind in John 9, we get an idea that poverty or a disability of some kind was linked to sin. The thought was basically that people deserved their position because of what they did or what their relatives did.
The disciples, in John 9, asked Jesus, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”(v. 2) Jesus turns their assumption upside down, “Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.” (v. 3)

Look at the book of Job also for this.

I don’t think that this notion of deserving our fate is too far removed from our modern thoughts. We still believe, too much of the time, that people are in trouble because of something they did or failed to do, because of laziness or some other character flaws.

We might also feel that if we try to help, we might end up being taken advantage of or enabling people to continue in their self-destructive behavior. Jesus does not ask us to leave our brain at the door when we follow him but he asks us to open our hearts to human suffering and need and respond accordingly. It is a challenge for sure.

Here is an exotic tale to illustrate: An Arab prince once owned a beautiful horse which was the envy of all. One man in particular tried to buy the horse, but the prince refused to set a price. One day the prince was riding across the desert. He saw the body of a man lying in the path, apparently exhausted. The prince dismounted and put the unfortunate traveler on his horse. Immediately, the traveled revived, straightened up and rode off. It was the very man who had tried so often to buy the prince’s horse. Now he had obtained the horse without paying anything.
“Wait!” cried the prince. “Please tell no one how you got that horse.”
“Why?” laughed the thief, “are you afraid they will laugh at you?”
“No” said the prince, “I am afraid it might hinder someone else from offering help to some other traveler whose need is genuine.” The eternal dilemma: We see someone in need, but we are afraid that we will be taken advantage of if we try to help or we’re afraid that they are somehow undeserving.

Things were not perfect then either. Read the story of Ananias and Sapphira which follows our story today (Acts 5:1-10). They sold a piece of property but lied, with dire consequences, about the proceeds they were giving to the church.
The distribution of food and other necessities was not always without problems either. Read the story of the distribution of food to the Grecian (Hellenist) Jewish widows in Acts 6. This leads directly to the choosing of seven “deacons” to deal with the situation.

Things are not perfect now but we are called nevertheless to be good stewards of what God has entrusted us with. This might mean, among other things, that we work with agencies like Church Community Services or Salvation Army to help insure that something is done to help the less fortunate.

3. GREAT WITNESS: I have shared with you briefly before that I was loved into the Kingdom. There is something really compelling and attractive about a group of people coming together and doing their best to love one another and impact their surrounding in the name of Jesus.

I told you before that I hang out with a bunch of male pastors who talk sports quite a bit. So I am trying to educate myself some on American sports. I came across this story which made me chuckle. I am assuming it is true. For you football fans, “Tommy Bell, a member of the Southland Christian Church in Lexington, KY, was a NFL referee in the third Super Bowl between the New York Jets and Baltimore Colts in 1968 (Wikipedia). In that Super Bowl, Fred O’ Brien was a player. Now Fred had one good eye and one glass eye. In one play he hit the other guy so hard with his helmet that his glass eye popped out and fell on the dusty ground. So they stopped the game, picked up the glass eye, washed it off and then Fred popped it back into his eye socket.
Tommy Bell, the referee, walked over to him and said, “Fred, I didn’t know you had just one eye. What in the world are you doing playing football? Don’t you realize how dangerous this is? What if someone should poke you in your good eye? You’d be blind. What would you do if you were blind?” O’Brien turned to Tommy Bell and said, “I’d be a referee, just like you.”

I like that story. God gave me two eyes and a body that is only going to be around for a while so I am not going to sit around here with my hands folded waiting for life to get easy. God has given each of us gifts and graces to be used in his name. In John 13:35, Jesus says, “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you’re my disciples.” (NLT)

American author and war correspondent Marguerite Higgins (1920-1966) was the first woman to win a Pulitzer prize for reporting what she heard from an old army sergeant in Korea during the Korean conflict. 15,000 of our soldiers had been dug in for several weeks, facing more than 100,000 communist soldiers on the other side of the valley. They had been shooting at each other for weeks. They had been living on K rations, unable to bathe, unable to shave. They just sat there day after day cold and freezing, thinking that today might be their day to die.

Marguerite Higgins climbed to the top of the hill with her notebook and pencil to interview the soldiers. She went from one to another until she came to this tough old army sergeant. She posed this question to him, “If I were God and if I could give you anything you wanted, what would you ask for?” The old sergeant thought for a moment, repeated the question and said, “Well, if you were God and if you could give me anything I wanted, here is what I would ask for: I would ask for tomorrow… I would ask for tomorrow.”

Thanks to Jesus we have been given tomorrow. That’s what one of my favorite hymns affirms as well:
Because he lives, I can face tomorrow;
Because he lives, all fear is gone;
Because I know he holds the future
And life is worth the living just because he lives. (UMH 364)

Easter makes a difference. It did then. It does now. The Easter power is available to us through Jesus. We can live today and face tomorrow thanks to Jesus.

I find it really interesting that we are looking at this text in the midst of the worst economic recession we have been faced with since the Great Depression, commentators tell us.

In times of struggles and uncertainty, there is a strong inclination for us to look inward and take care of ourselves. There is a strong inclination to grow blinders preventing us to see the needs around us. There is a strong inclination to dwell on what we think we cannot do, or on what we think we do not have. There is a strong inclination to forget that we are the Church.

Do you hear: Because he lives, all fear is gone.

Dan Parker shared a great verse from the Bible with the finance committee this past week in his starting devotion:

“Give whatever you can according to what you have. If you are really eager to give, it isn’t important how much you are able to give. God wants you to give what you have, not what you don’t have.” (2 Cor. 8:11-12)

Because He lives we can face tomorrow. Amen!

When God sends a Saint

2009-04-25T12:49:00.000-07:00

I lost someone precious to me recently. Actually, many of us within the Church lost someone precious. Erland Waltner died at the age of 94 on Easter Sunday.

Erland had been a pastor since 1935. He then became a Bible professor and President of Mennonite Biblical Seminary from 1958-1978. He then continued as part-time faculty from 1978-1998 and continued to offer spiritual direction until a week before his death.
He had doctorate degrees etc…

But what I remember him for is as my spiritual director for a couple of years while I was in seminary at AMBS here in Elkhart. He was one of the most faith-filled men I have ever known. He was never full of himself or boastful. He was gentle and patient and witty and funny. He taught me a lot about discerning the Spirit, about prayer, about faithfulness, about perseverance... He was a cheerleader to young, green seminarians like me.

He called me in Frankfort when I was first appointed there after graduating from seminary. He called me at New Salem to see how things were. He knew I was at Bethel and had told me he was praying for me there.

He and I corresponded via email for a time until his eye sight got too bad (macular degeneration) and he became legally blind. His mind stayed sharp till the end though. After that he or I would call off and on. We would talk about ministry, life, aging… I would see him at seminary sometimes when I went to the library or attended chapel

The past few years have been rough on him and his wife Winifred but when I would talk with him, he still praised God for His goodness and it was not faked. He never denied the storms and the pain, but his faith was stronger. I loved him. I believe he knew that even though I never told him in so many words.

I rejoice because he is Home and Easter is a good day to go Home but I feel like crying – am crying – because I will miss him.

It is interesting how you realize when your life comes in contact with a saint.

A Great Life

2009-04-05T16:58:00.000-07:00

Since I have turned 40, a few years ago, I have been in the habit of checking the obituaries in the paper. Not sure what that’s all about. Maybe I want to make sure I am not in there! Actually, I find myself checking for who died, because I know quite a few people in Elkhart and many are elderly. I find also myself checking for who the pastor is performing the service. I often say a breath prayer for them.

It is interesting to read how old people were when they died. I pause when I see that someone died who is younger than me or my age. Reminds me of my own mortality.

I read about what people did in their life, I look to see if they have kids and grandkids.
I find myself somewhat disconcerted when I read that some people, for whatever reason, forgo a funeral service. To read that someone will have no service or memorial and that often cremation will take or as taken place is rather sad. Doesn’t seem quite right to end a life this way.

I find myself wondering about life. How unsettling that a life is summarized in a short column. I start wondering what people will say about me when I die. Maybe I should write something myself to make sure my obituary will read how I want it to read. What would I say? How will I be remembered? Will I be remembered? I wonder since we have no children.

There are some people that somehow you think can never die.
In my head I know that everyone will die one day but there are some people I have known all of your life and somehow I cannot quite imagine them not being there. I think of my parents, who are both now in their late 70’s. Even though we are not close geographically, I cannot imagine my life without them in it. Not hearing their voice on the phone…
John and Helen DeWees were such people. Mom had John as a teacher in HS. John was a red coat at the hospital till he was 95. They both sang at church. John and Helen were the sweetest people you could ever find. They are both gone now.

Another such person was June Deal.I read June’s obituary this week. She was 92. I have heard about June pretty much all of my life. She had a 48 year teaching career mostly at Elkhart High School, which is no more since 1972. She taught when my Mom was a student there in the 1940’s and early 1950’s. I have pictures of June in my Mom’s 1951 senior year book. Incredibly they never changed much. Same hair style. Just got a little smaller and thinner.

June was a member of Trinity UMC since 1936. This is where I met her. She never married, had no biological kids. My Mom, when I called her in France to let her know about June, said that back then women could not marry if they wanted to be teachers. Wow. Almost like going into the priesthood. But June had many adoped kids and grandkids and great-grandkids through her students and their kids and grandkids. She came to my Mom’s 50th and 55th high school reunion a few years back and everybody loved on her.

I had gotten more acquainted with her personally when I joined Trinity years ago before going to seminary and moving on to serve other churches. Got to know her also through CARES (Community Actively Relating to Elkhart Schools), a local mentoring program, which I am a part of. I loved June. She was my kind of woman. Strong, intelligent, funny, well-read, with a passion for learning and education, a passion for helping people.

June was a grand lady. I give thanks for her life and legacy. I hear that Trinity UMC has established a scholarship fund in her name to be used for educational needs. That’s cool.

As we are starting Holy Week, I also give thanks for the gift of salvation which comes to us through Jesus. Because Jesus gave his life, we can have life here now and for eternity and if anyone is welcome in Heaven with Jesus, I would say that June has a spot. I thank God for June.

The Servant King

2009-04-05T15:44:00.000-07:00

Palm Sunday Sermon

Gloria Swanson was one of Hollywood’s top actresses from the 1920’s to the 1950’s. She was quite ambitious. Early in her career, Swanson was quoted as saying, “I have gone through enough of being a nobody. I have decided that when I am a star I will be every inch and every moment the star! Everybody from the studio gate man to the highest executive will know it.” And Swanson made sure of that. Before returning from a trip to France, she sent a telegram to her film studio informing them that she expected a grand welcome when she arrived in California. To quote the telegram: “Arriving with the Marquis tomorrow morning. Stop. Please arrange ovation.” The studio knew enough not to argue with their star. An ovation was duly arranged.

Jesus does not have to arrange his own ovation when he enters Jerusalem. Word about him have been spreading through the countryside. Healer, teacher, leader: he was becoming quite a celebrity as holy week begins; too much celebrity to suit the entrenched bureaucracy. And so, even as the crowd waves its palm branches and shouts its Hosannas, the shadow of the cross looms in the background: In the bright sunlight of adoration but still on the edge of night.

Jesus is not fooled by the crowd’s adoration. He knows that public opinion is a fickle thing. One day you are a hero, the next you are out of office. You’ve got to give the public what it wants, an image consultant surely would have instructed Jesus to ride a mighty stallion into Jerusalem that day instead of a humble donkey.

The people don’t understand. They shout “Hosanna”. They yearn for a deliverer that would fight off the Roman invaders and send them packing. Jesus is a king but not the king they are expecting.

Jesus knows where he is headed. He does not welcome it: Rejection, pain and death is not the cup he would have chosen for himself but he will be obedient to his Father even if this means death. This death is necessary for our salvation:

Listen to the Message paraphrase of the Philippians text today:
“Think of yourselves the way Christ Jesus thought of himself. He had equal status with God but didn’t think so much of himself that he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside the privileges of deity and took on the status of a slave, became human! Having become human, he stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling process. He didn’t claim special privileges. Instead he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a selfless, obedient death - and the worst kind of death at that – a crucifixion. Because of that obedience, God lifted him high and honored him far beyond anyone or anything, ever, so that all created beings in heaven and on earth – even those long ago dead and buried – will bow in worship before this Jesus Christ, and call out in praise that he is the Master of all (the NIV reads that Jesus Christ is Lord), to the glorious honor of God the Father. (vv. 2:6-11)

Philippians 2:5-11 is one of my favorite passages in the Bible. It offers what may very well be one of the oldest Christological reflections (understanding of Christ) in the entire New Testament. Because of the poetic splendor of these verses, there is considerable suggestion that these texts made up an early Christian hymn, which Paul skillfully incorporates into his letter. If this is indeed the case, the theology behind this hymn represents not only Paul’s own thoughts, but also the Christological convictions of the first generation of believers.

Paul had founded the Philippian church early on during a missionary journey around A.D. 50. Paul was persecuted while in Philippi and the Christians of the church there are now also facing a significant opposition so Paul’s letter to them is a call to persistence in faith. They also experience some internal dissention. He writes to them now about 10 years after their start while he awaits trial in Rome. He challenges them to stand firm in one spirit and to strive side by side with “one mind” for the faith of the gospel (v. 1:27). He tells them that humility is essential for those who have the “mind” that was in Jesus Christ (v. 5). Philippians 2:1-13 is a reflection on humility and the example of Christ, beginning with some words of advice (vv. 1-4) and then transitioning into a poetic reflection on the shocking self-emptying of the Lord (vv. 5-11.)

The thoughts expressed in Philippians 2 will be picked up years later in what we call the Nicene Creed which was adopted by the Council of Nicea in A.D. 325 and modified in A.D 381 in the Niceno-Constantinopolitan Creed.

Before his days on earth, Christ enjoyed complete equality with the Father (John 17:24)
Jesus is unalterably in the form of God, but he laid it willingly down for our sake. He emptied himself of his divinity to take upon himself his humanity. This is not role-playing as some would have us believe.

Even in human form, his essential nature remained unchanged; he was still God (John 5:18). Yet so that he might take away the sins of the world, he voluntarily laid aside the privileges and glory of his heavenly authority (v. 8). He surrendered the splendor of his position to identify with sinful humanity.

Christ’s action has been described as the laying aside during the incarnation of the independent use of his divine attributes. He performed miracles but always under the direction of the Father and the Holy Spirit. Jesus was so committed to his Father’s plan that he obeyed even to the point of death (Heb. 5:8)

Paul does not specifically spell it here out but there is an obvious parallel between Adam and Jesus, who was known as the second Adam. The comparison juxtaposes the disobedience of the human Adam, who grasped at a divine status that was not his to take, with the obedience of a truly divine Christ, who gladly relinquished divinity for the sake of saving fallen humanity.

“Taking the form of a slave/servant” and “being made/born in human likeness” are both ways of identifying Jesus as fully human. The “slave” or “servant” image certainly calls to mind the Suffering Servant of Isaiah chapters 42-53 – a servant who also willingly undergoes suffering and humiliation for the sake of others. But the “slavery” this emptied Christ takes on could also be a reference to the weight of human sinfulness under which all men and women are born.

While I was pondering Jesus’ sacrifice this week, I thought of a wonderful Charles Wesley Hymn titled, “And Can it Be That I Should Gain” (UMH 363). Turn to your hymnal and sing these poignant words with me:

1. And can it be that I should gain
an interest in the Savior's blood!
Died he for me? who caused his pain!
For me? who him to death pursued?
Amazing love! How can it be
that thou, my God, shouldst die for me?
Amazing love! How can it be
that thou, my God, shouldst die for me?

2. He left his Father's throne above
(so free, so infinite his grace!),
emptied himself of all but love,
and bled for Adam's helpless race.
'Tis mercy all, immense and free,
for O my God, it found out me!

I took a class in seminary which touched me and touches me still. I mentioned this before. It was a class on “suffering and the atonement.” We talked about what we think happened on the cross. It really remains a mystery after all. But one of the theories which deeply resonates with me is Peter Abelard’s (Dialectician philosopher and theologian born 1079. Died 1142) Moral Influence Theory. This is what we have been singing about this morning. Rather than a payment to or victory over the Devil, or a satisfaction of a debt owed to God, Abelard sees Jesus’ life and death as a demonstration of God’s love that moves sinners to repent and love God.

When you and I understand (even in glimpses, imperfectly) that we are loved beyond words, something happens to our heart: It begins to melt. We find ourselves wanting to love God and people back. In ways I don’t fully understand, we find ourselves drawn to this Jesus and wanting to follow him.

Do you remember last week’s sermon on John 12:1-8, when Mary anoints Jesus’ feet with expensive perfumed ointment? In that story we get to see Jesus’ humanity. He had to have been scared and troubled by what laid ahead. He was so close to Jerusalem and he knew what awaited him there. He needed and welcomed Mary’s extravagant act of love and devotion for him. She loved him deeply and responded to the love she had received. Maybe Jesus had healed her somewhere, sometime along the way, during one of his visits to Bethany. That is an incredible story.

Our text today is an incredible story too. Imagine: Christianity is a new religion and God is depicted as a slave who emptied and humbled himself!

The whole New Testament is incredible: It depicts a man who is born in a barn, in a obscure corner of a Roman-ruled province; We see a man who is tempted in the wilderness; a man who needs love and comfort like the rest of us; a man who struggles and prays a heart breaking prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane; a man who ends up suffering pain beyond comprehension and dying nailed to a cross because he loves us more than his life…

And this is God!?

I am telling you, this is one of the reasons which tipped my heart toward Jesus. We have a God who loves us beyond words to the point of coming in the flesh, to live and die to save us. This is one of the reasons I know God is real. Who in their right mind would depict a God on the cross if it were not true? It does not seem to me that this would be the best way to get followers. A God who dies on the cross!? Why not talk instead of a god who is all mighty, ruling from above, untouched by our lives below. This is nuts! Yet 1 Corinthians 1:18 says it this way: “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.”

Paul used this beautiful hymn to the Philippian church (but also to us): So that our hearts would be touched and transformed; So that the same attitude of humility and selflessness would be in us too. Believers cannot duplicate the precise ministry of Jesus but they can display the same attitude.

Paul exhorts his readers and listeners to have the same attitude as Christ. What does that mean?
I often spend time during the week with pastors. Most are male. Invariably we talk about sports or cars. I am also married to a car enthusiast. So I hear car stories and the following is one I heard:

A man had posted an article he had written on the Internet about an old car he once had. In his words, this car was ratty and ragged, driven when he was a poor college student. He was having trouble with something he couldn’t readily identify, so he took it to the repair shop. The mechanic looked at it a couple of minutes and said, “What you really need is the radiator cap solution.”
“Oh” said the young automobile owner, trying not to sound too confused. “Do you mean the radiator cap isn’t holding enough pressure?”

“That’s part of the problem” said the mechanic. “You need to lift the radiator cap and drive another car under it. Then the next day you can replace the radiator cap, and it should solve your problem.”

In order to have the mind and heart of Christ, that is what we would have to do – replace not just our attitudes and opinions, but lift these attitudes and opinions and drive a whole new person under them, then throw the old attitudes and opinons out and replace them with new ones.

When we let Jesus in our hearts, we can be transformed in that way. We become new creation in Christ (2 Cor. 5:17). We become more like Jesus and with the Spirit’s help we can get to the point of saying to God, “Not my will but your will be done.”

Have you checked for attitudes lately? Are they Christ-like?

Communication

2009-04-05T15:32:00.000-07:00

Communication. I watched a show on TV the other day. I can’t remember the station. It was something like the History or Science channel. The show talked about what differentiates human beings from animals. The show explained how our physiology - the size and shape of our cranium, and consequently the size of our brain and the design of our throat etc… - enable us to produce sounds and pitches that other animals can’t. With this ability came better communication capabilities. Increased and better communication, the show went on, gave us a clear advantage in term of survival.

Communication. If you are married, have a family and have friends (that should cover everybody, right?), you know the importance of communication. How tricky communicating with one another can be. Things can go down hill quickly if we fail to communicate properly.
In marriage counseling, quite a bit of time and effort can be spent helping folks actually communicate, instead of talking “above each others’ head”, where the spouses are not really talking with or listening to one another.

I remember a little bit of a speech class I had years ago in college and I remember that we talked about the mechanics of communication. How a “message” is sent and how it is “received” and the interference that are in the way of the sender and receiver. If you have ever played the game of “telephone”, you get the idea of what I mean. A message starts one way and ends up garbled at the other end. There are so many things which can go wrong, beginning with the sender, the space between the sender and the receiver and the receiver itself. Sometimes I think it is amazing that we understand each other at all. I know that I don’t always communicate as clearly as I want to. So I am trying to get better. I am looking at is a book titled, “How to communicate: The Ultimate Guide to Improving Your Personal and Professional Relationships.” I have had this book for a while but had never read it until now.

Communication. I think of communication quite a bit because part of my calling is sharing God’s Word with people. I spend quite a bit of my week praying for, thinking about and crafting the message that I deliver each week. I think about flow, about transitions, about delivery… I had a preaching class in seminary. I have read books about preaching but I want to keep learning and get better so I have started to read a neat resource titled, “The Art and Craft of Biblical Preaching” to help me hopefully improve in this endeavor. This book is a hefty tome at over 700 pages. The title struck me because it says the “Art and Craft.” Communication is a skill which can be learned. No one is born knowing how to effectively communicate. It is more than words as you know also, it is body language, the tone of one’s voice, one’s culture, one’s gender in relationship to the people receiving the message… Communication requires sustained intention and care.

So I think a lot about communication as a pastor but I think we all need to give thoughts to this because it is really important for all of us to communicate clearly.

The resources I mentioned above are certainly helpful but I don’t want to forget that Jesus gives us a model of healthy communication among Christians in the Bible. Look at Matthew 18:15-17. It says: Go directly to the person you have a problem with and talk; no gossiping behind the person’s back; no holding on and chewing on something for days, no triangling – trying to get others to take side. Go and talk directly with the one you have a problem with. If this does not work well, than bring one or two others with you and go talk with the person you have issues with. In our denomination, this might be someone from the Staff-Parish committee. In the first church that I served, things unfortunately escalated and the District Superintendent got involved, along with a conflict management consultant, a retired pastor. I hope to never get to that point again. It was ugly and it was painful and I am sure God cringed.

Few things can hurt a church more and lead to faster decline than lack of, or unhealthy communication, among folks. My experiences with churches is that we are not very good usually at communicating clearly. We are usually pretty good at undercover, guerilla warfare, sadly enough. Things are said behind people’s back. Egos get bruised. We don’t want to offend so we don’t say what we really feel. Feelings get hurt but we hold on to a grudge because we are unable or unwilling – because of pride maybe - to talk with the people we feel resentment toward…. Mole hills soon grow into mountains. Do you know what I mean?

Communication. I believe most of the world’s problems stem at some level from lack of or poor communication; from an unwillingness to listen and understand others…

Communication. Clear, healthy, loving communication among Christians can offer a great witness to unchurched, unbelieving people also. Let’s do our best to have healthy, loving communication. As the hymn says, “they’ll know we are Christians by our love.”

Heavenly Brew

2009-03-28T11:23:00.000-07:00

A pastor friend describes life as something akin to a book. Life has chapters, he says. One ends, another starts. Often I find myself not wanting for chapters to end. I want to hold on to the good stuff, I am not always good at letting people go. I want to freeze-frame moments of peace and joy… I shared this with the owner of my favorite coffee shop this morning. This place of retreat and sanctuary is closing today. The economy proved to be too hard. I wrote Sharon a card. I wasn’t quite sure what to say and how to say it. I feel things deeply but I am not always real good at translating my feelings into words, but I wrote this:
“Dear Sharon and Heavenly Brew Team: Today is more than likely a bittersweet day. But I hope you celebrate the fact that you have provided this community a great place to be. You will certainly be missed but the cozy times of intimacy with friends, the animated conversations, the soul warming goodies will not be forgotten.
I, for one, will never forget the grace of an oatmeal cranberry cookie when I was facing medical uncertainty earlier this year. You were a true angel in disguise that day.
This is the beginning of a new chapter and I wish you the very best.”

I hope this does not sound too trite or cheesy. But however clumsy this might be, I wrote it from my heart.
I know God is not done with Sharon and the gift of warmth and hospitality she possesses. She will continue to bless others. I hope our paths will cross again.
I rejoice at new opportunities which are coming but I have to be honest, I grieve today also. I told Sharon, and maybe this is selfish, that I looked forward a couple of times a week, after working out at the Y, to getting a cup of coffee at her place and just sit for a while before the day would start in full force. This was a great place to be, to read, to watch people and meet friends and make new friends. Sharon and the staff got to know my name and what I do quickly. They always seemed happy to see me as I was to see them. I felt welcome. They got to know and remember that I like cranberry oatmeal cookies, that I like their berry oatmeal-bake warmed up and without milk. They knew my favorite flavored coffee was Blueberry Muffin.
Someone in front of me ordering today said that she felt as if she had been evicted with nowhere to go since Heavenly Brew will be no more. I feel a little like that. Where will I go to get coffee and soul-warming goodies but more importantly where will I go when I need to be, when I need community? Church is one place but it is not the same. This was a different kind of sanctuary.

Hunger

2009-03-28T10:55:00.000-07:00

I went to a briefing on hunger this past week. This was a gathering of church folks mostly, organized by United Way. The intent was to talk about the face of hunger in our community and talk about the available sources of support and what we can do to help. With the recession, more and more people are affected. The Salvation Army captain said that some of the people who used to give to the Salvation Army are now some of the ones receiving help. The irony of this is that we met at Das Dutchman Essenhaus in Middlebury over breakfast! We ate our scrambled eggs, fried potatoes, sausage and sweet rolls while talking about hungry people. I did not eat much. My breakfast did not go down well that morning.
The other irony I thought about is that I am, let say, pleasantly plump. I work out at the Y several times a week to try to slow down the passage of time and the hold that gravity has gotten on me and tone everything up. I also work out because doing so clears my head and relaxes me and I am hopefully a nicer, calmer person because I do this. While I do that, some in this world starve to death. One could get real cynical here. This world has enough ills and suffering in it. Getting cynical and sarcastic would be really easy. I choose not to go that route.
Instead, I find myself giving thanks for the fact that I am healthy, that I have plenty of food, the fact that I am loved and I am also reminded and encouraged greatly to find ways to help those who have less than I do. Starving myself will not help these folks get food but out of my wealth and blessings I can give and for that I find myself very grateful. Life is a great gift not to be wasted but to be lived to the full and I don’t believe that can happen without love, serving others and sharing.
The gathering of representatives for about 50 local churches is a miracle, one of the speakers pointed out. Together we can find solutions. Feed the hungry and clothe the naked are some of the things Jesus admonished us to do (Matthew 25). What I also want to do is find ways of dealing with the system which allows such things to happen. Nobody in the world should go hungry but to hear of hunger in America, the richest country in the world, is crazy. So I want to find effective ways of helping. I can’t feed everybody on my own but God has a way of multiplying a little food (remember the story of the feeding of the multitude with just a few loaves of bread and a couple of fish?) into a lot if we all work together. I want to be part of that! I hope you join me! One way is to fill up a grocery bag on May 9 and leave it by your mailbox for the mail carrier to pick up. There will be volunteer opportunities that day. You will hear more about it soon.

Change

2009-03-01T15:25:00.000-08:00

This is an article I shared with our congregation in our March newsletter.

Change. I’ve been thinking a lot about change this past year.
I have been thinking about change because there are a lot of things going on in each of our lives. We experience aging. We experience new births and the death of loved ones. We experience change in our living situations. Some get married; Others divorced. Some of us have lost a job and with it more than income and insurance but also a sense of our identity and maybe a sense of our worth.

I have been thinking about change because we have all felt the impact on our lives of the economic recession we are experiencing. Our money does not stretch as far as it used to. I think of that every time Steve and I buy groceries. I think of this and I am more grateful than ever to have meaningful employment and a roof above our heads.

I have been thinking about change as we enter the season of Lent. It is a time of introspection and a time when we are called anew to ponder Jesus’ question “Who do you say I am?” and the questions of “who are we?” and “whose are we?” These are questions we have to answer as individuals and as a church body. If we answer, “Jesus in our LORD”, this means that we are called to follow and following is not a static, unchanging thing.

I have been thinking about change because of the election of Barak Obama. Whether we agree with his political views or not, it is undeniable that we are entering a new chapter in history.

I have been thinking about change because our church and our Indiana Conference are in the middle of great change and transition. As you know, the coming together of the North and South Indiana Conferences was approved last year and we are now deep in the transition time and implementation and working the nitty gritty details.

I have been thinking about change because Bethel is in transition and we are faced with decisions having to do with how to remain faithful as a church and faithful to our mission of making disciples of Jesus. You’ll hear more about this in the weeks and months to come.

I would venture to say that most of us, if not all of us, have mixed feelings about change: Change can be exciting and it can be scary and often change is all these things at once. We can embrace change or we can resist it. In the end, whether we embrace or resist change, it is inevitable and it is part of life.

I am talking with several people about change and how to negotiate transitions in our personal life as well as in our gatherings of people we call the church.

I went to a seminar in February, after having read several books from our presenter, and we talked about how to introduce change in churches. There are some good ways of doing this and there are not so good ways of doing this. One of the pastors who attended recalled how she served a church which had forgotten its purpose and which refused/never found ways to adapt to meet the needs of a changing neighborhood. They used to be a large downtown church, well attended by wealthy parishioners. But through the years, attendance dwindled to less than 50. They do have a beautiful, European-inspired, church, which only remains open because of an endowment fund. She said it looks more like a mausoleum than a church. What striked me is that she did not say, museum – which is bad enough; she said mausoleum - a place where the dead are buried. This saddened me. I know the church and another friend is serving there now. I hope he can help revive this place through the people in it and by inviting others to come and experience life with Jesus. This will require changing hearts and minds and it will require a lot of work on everyone’s part.

When I think of change and transitions, I think of the story of the Exodus in the Bible; how the people found themselves facing new situations. They had to learn new ways and they had to adapt and it did not always go very smoothly. Many even grumbled that the slavery in Egypt they had just left would be better than that they were experiencing in the wilderness. It’s interesting how we remember things. The good ol’ days were usually not as good as we might remember them. They grumbled so much that God ended up giving them a lot of extra time to think and hopefully mature. It also took the passing of the rebellious generation before the rest of the people could enter the Promised Land.

When I think of change and transitions, I also think of 1st and 2nd Peter. In these letters, the author, whom we think was the apostle Peter, exhorts the scattered Christians in Asia Minor (present day Turkey) to hold fast to their faith and their trust of God in the face of hardship. We started the study of these letters and what they have to say to us last Monday. It is not too late to join the study!

When I think of change and transitions, I think of prayer. As people of God we are called to pray without ceasing. I don’t believe we can live life very well and negotiate the inevitable changes and transitions, which come our way without talking with God and seeking His guidance.

When I think of change and transitions, I think of God because no matter what we all face, He is with us and will guide us through when we seek Him.

One question that our seminar leader asked - and that question haunts me in some ways - is “If your church closed, would anyone in the neighborhood, in the community, notice and care? Would your church be missed by anyone outside of it?”

I have this place

2009-02-20T13:48:00.000-08:00

I have this place. It’s a cute coffee shop that used to be a flower shop on E. Jackson not far from the Y. It’s a cozy place. Looks like it was a home at one time. I have my favorite table in that place, in a corner, towards the back.

I have this place where the people who work there know my name and they know that I like a cranberry oatmeal cookie with my coffee. And they know that I like strawberry-banana smoothies and I like my berry oatmeal bake warmed up and without milk; like a piece of coffee cake.
I have a place. I go there, not so much for the food (especially now that I am trying to be on a lower carb diet) but I go there because of the peace and grace I often find.

Earlier this year, I had a health thing which got me on edge for about a week while I waited for the biopsy result. I went to this place right after the tissue sample was taken and I received a much needed dose of grace – in the form of a free cookie and a warm smile. I never told the owner that she was an angel in disguise that day. Maybe I should tell her. The results of the biopsy came out as benign.

I go to this place alone to read, to think through things, to think about an upcoming sermon... I go there fairly regularly just to be for a while. To talk with God.
I go there to meet with a friend and talk about life. I go there with someone from the church to discuss ministry possibilities.

I was there this morning, with a pastor friend. I received grace from that person who has been more than patient with this green, searching, pastor on many occasions. He listened to me. Shared some thoughts for a little while. It was good.

Jesus had places too. In one place he would withdraw regularly and pray. He had another place which belonged to two sisters, where he could get away from the craziness of life and the business of ministry in order to be renewed and readied again for service. People – sometimes his own disciples - often tried to go after him and tried to make him feel guilty about not being with the people all the time as they eagerly waited for him to heal their broken lives and their broken bodies. But Jesus knew when to say “enough”.

We seem to have a thing against slowing down in this culture. Some seem to take pride in the fact that they are always busy. Seems like their worth is tied to how busy they are.
It almost seems like we will be judged as lazy if we stop on a regular basis to just be.

I struggle with business but I know, and realize anew as we are getting ready to enter the season of Lent, that busy does not necessarily mean effective. I also know that I won’t be able to serve in the long haul if I don’t stop on a regular basis to just be.

As Christians, I think we all need to become counter-cultural in how we use our time and how we define our worth.
Do you have a place? Do you stop on a regular basis to just be?

Faith

2009-02-08T16:10:00.001-08:00

There are some things in life that you just hope you never have to do. One of these things happened to me this past Wednesday: I officiated at the funeral of one of our nieces, 21 year old Jennifer in Ohio. The cause of death is still being worked on but it looks like a brain aneurism took her too soon.
I have officiated at several funerals before but they were always for elderly people who were not related to me.
Over 100 people showed up and stayed for her viewing on Tuesday and again for the service on Wednesday. She had been in band in High School and I would bet most of the band was present to honor her. It was just unbelievable how many lives she had touched in her young span of time here on the earth. Jen loved people and she loved horses. As she loved and gave in life so did she in death.
Jen was an organ donor. The doctors were able to use her liver, kidneys and corneas. That is such a comfort to know that she lives on through the recipients of these gifts of life.
The age old questions of how can there be a loving God when things like this happen surfaced. How is pain and suffering able to coexist with love? What kind of explanation can I give? This is not a sin related thing. It just is and I have no explanation. Job comes to mind.
In the end I have to trust that God walks with us in this time of trial and that He cares. I believe, help my unbelief.

Witnessing History

2009-01-21T14:59:00.000-08:00

I have been watching quite a bit of news broadcasts these past few days and been emotionally moved a lot.

Monday (usually my day off) was spent between the History Channel, which honored the life and legacy of Martin Luther King, Jr. and stations like CNN, MSNBC, and Fox as they each broadcasted the pre-inaugural festivities for Barack Obama.
I have usually voted for presidential elections but this is the first one when I find myself truly moved and with the sense of witnessing something important and historical. I find myself wanting to understand the political system better. I find myself wanting to learn more about Martin and the whole civil rights movement.

This is not part of my heritage. I was not born and I did not grow up in the United States. American history was not taught to me growing up. French history was. Twenty years ago I had a couple American history classes in college while Steve and I lived in Texas. I enjoy history, I just don’t have a lot of time to read about it as much I would like to, with the other things that I want to read and need to read. This is something I want to remedy.

I was surprised to find myself teary-eyed these past couple of days because I was 3 when Martin Luther King Jr, was assassinated. I believe what moves me is the dedication of one’s life for peace and justice to the point of accepting death as a very probable result of one’s involvement. The men’s dedication is not the only thing that touched me. With each of these men was a strong, dedicated woman and these men would not have achieved what they achieved without these women. What was true for Martin is true for Barack.

Whether one is Republican or Democrat (or something else), the hope that is currently present is undeniable and America desperately needs hope.

Hope is what some pastoral colleagues and I saw and felt when we shared Hawaiian pizza together (here goes the low carb diet) as we were watching Obama’s inauguration on TV. The pastor who invited us to her home said about the pizza, “if it is good enough for Barack, it is good enough for us” (and it was good pizza.) We had a great time together, sitting in this small living room. Giggled at Aretha Franklin’s hat. Commented on what we heard being said. There was this sense of unity despite the fact that we don’t all share the same views on several things (our host is a Unitarian Universalist pastor; we had a United Church of Christ pastor, a Presbyterian and me.) But we could all agree that it is time for a change; that it is time to work harder than ever toward peace and unity and we believe that this starts with us.

Now the danger is to place too much hope of the shoulders of Barack. His name means “blessed” but he is not the Messiah. The challenges are huge – and regardless of political parties and ideologies - it is going to take everybody working together to get us out of the mess we are in. Whether we agree with everything Barack is going to try to achieve or not, he needs our prayers.

A prisoner of Jesus Christ

2009-01-10T15:46:00.000-08:00

“…I, Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus…” That phrase has been echoing in my heart and mind these past several weeks. It comes from Ephesians 3:1. That was one of the lectionary texts (3:1-12) for Epiphany Sunday, January 4. On that Sunday, we recognized and remembered anew that all the world, Jews and non-Jews (Gentiles), has been called into the family of God. That is the mystery that God has given Paul, this first century missionary pastor, to tell the people. I preached on that. On how good it is to be part of the family but also on the privilege and responsibility we have been given also to let people know… To let them know that they are not too broken, or too messed up or whatever to come and have a relationship with Jesus. They are loved and welcomed.
That is an amazing message of grace. A message that I have and continue to be the recipient of.

“…I, Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus…” But that phrase keeps rattling within me. I have thought about it off and on as I lay in bed at night, reviewing my day, talking with God, waiting for sleep to come…

“…I, Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus…” The immediate meaning is that Paul is telling the folks he is writing to (Ephesians and others since this is apparently a circular letter, commentators tell us) that he is in jail. Scholars believe he was imprisoned in Rome when he wrote the letter. But what I also think he is telling them and us – and that is the part that gets me - is that his love for Jesus is so profound, so deep, and so powerful that it controls him. All of him. Every decision he makes. Every moment of his life…

That statement must have jarred the folks at the Ephesus church. By all accounts, they were great folks. Paul writes, “Since I first heard of your strong faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for God’s people everywhere, I have not stopped thanking God for you.” (Eph. 1:15, NLT) But then the writer of Revelation says this about the followers of Jesus in Ephesus “Yet I hold this against you. You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first.” (v. 2:4-5a, NIV)

Paul is calling them and us to wake up, to not go through the motion of faith, to not play church. Instead he prays that passion – that fire in our belly for God and people – would be re-ignited.
There is something really powerful, really contagious, about a life lived with passion; in the best sense of the term.

I went to my seminary recently to a communion service in honor of Erland Waltner. Erland is 94. He was my spiritual director when I was in seminary. He is one of the most faithful, wise, grace-filled person I know. He has a passion for God, for people, for teaching… He and his wife are going through great times of changes and transition in terms of health and living arrangements. They have recently moved from the home they had lived in for years, across the street to the seminary, to a retirement place in Goshen.
When I read what Paul says about himself, I think of Erland. He is a prisoner of Jesus Christ. It is obvious God has all of him. He shines with a quiet, strong and steady faith. Erland is legally blind but the eyes of his heart and the discernment of his spirit are sharp. He could see right through the confusion experienced by this green pastor not so long ago. His passion and love for Jesus are inspiring.

I remember reading the newsletter from a local counseling agency and the director was talking about the passion that he has for what he does and the passion he sees in his colleagues and also in some of the people they serve. This therapist wrote, “The word "passion" itself has an interesting history in Christian tradition. It derives from the Latin passio, which meant "to suffer," and also "to allow oneself to be acted upon" ("suffer the little children to come unto me" reflects this meaning), and especially to allow oneself to endure suffering – as in Jesus' Passion.

Passion is what Paul had, what Erland has, what some pastors I know have. A passion for God, for God’s people which drives their life. This passion enables them to bear their cross.

A pastor friend was talking about that recently. He shared his deep concern for children and how they grow up in this society. He wants them to have roots, a solid foundation rooted in Jesus and His love. He says that he wants kids to have a faith which will enable them to carry the crosses that bring unspeakable pain and loss to all our lives at one time or another.

I want that kind of faith, that kind of passion. I want to be a prisoner of Jesus. I want people to see Jesus in me and for them to come to Him. Amen.

The Story does not end with Christmas

2009-01-05T15:04:00.000-08:00

Steve and I took down the decoration off our Christmas tree and put the nativity set away today. The Christmas season is a bittersweet time for me because we are away from family and we don’t have biological children. The celebration is different, the food is different than in France... It is a busy time. But still I enjoy Christmas – not the marketers’ version of Christmas, mind you – I dislike shopping most of the time; but I like the lights and the ornaments, many of which have a history. We have stuffed teddy bears in winter outfits on our couch. One even plays music when you squeeze its paw.

And I never get tired of hearing the Story or telling the Story in various ways.

From as far back as I can remember as a child, it was my “job” to put up the crèche and that tradition remains. We have a neat nativity set. It’s not the “santons” (“little saints” in Provençal,) of my youth, those hand-painted clay figurines, dressed in traditional attire, prevalent in the south of France. My little resin friends of today look right out of first century Judea. The plaster houses look like what I imagine the houses back then would have looked like. I enjoy setting the scene and trying to imagine what life would have been like so long ago.

People, in my crèche rendition, go about their every day business, oblivious to the miracle happening right under their nose. That part has not changed all that much, has it?

The wise men are even part of my recreated story despite the fact that scholars don’t believe they reached Jesus until he was a 2 year-old toddler and long gone from the stable in Bethlehem. There are 3 wise men – an assumption based on the three gifts brought – again, probably not accurate either but frankly it does not matter all that much. The point, as our lectionary texts Sunday reminded us, is that outsiders: Gentiles (non-Jews), dirty-stinky shepherds… believed what they heard, responded and came to worship and became part of the family of God. Power, as the world understands it, was turned on its head, redefined, on that day.

So there is a little sadness because putting things away means that another year has gone by. The lights are put away and familiar and beloved carols won’t be sung for the next 12 months.

The end of the Christmas season kind of feels like I imagine the disciples must have felt coming down the mountain after transfiguration. There is part of me that wants to stay on the mountain, dazzled by visions and light. But I am reminded that I can’t stay on the mountain. Life happens on the plain and in the valley and occasionally there are mountain top experiences.

But “God is in us, God is for us, God is with us Emmanuel”; that is what the Casting Crown song I sang Sunday reminded us of. He is with us all year long, whether we are on a mountain or deep in the valley.

The Gift of Presence

2008-12-31T10:08:00.001-08:00

The gift of presence: That is the recurring thought and feeling I had the whole month of December. Several people I knew, or who were related to people I know, died in December. I found myself sitting with several grieving people during the season of Advent/Christmas. I found myself sitting also with people who had lost someone dear earlier in the year and for them, this would be their first Christmas without that beloved one. Before I did my Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE) Chaplaincy training some years back and received a little more counseling training and before I became a pastor, I found sitting with grieving people more difficult than I do now. There was a need in me to “fix” the situation; to say something profound which somehow would take the pain away and make things “right.” I was uncomfortable with silence; with people’s pain and tears; with my own emotions being stirred by their pain. There was a need in me to “do something” and move on quickly away from the situation.

I soon realized that there was nothing I could say to take the pain away; nothing I could do to “fix” the situation; nothing I could do to bring a loved one back. I felt very helpless and inadequate.
But then people would be appreciative and often they would hug me to thank me for being there. They would say things like “it means so much that you are here.” This would puzzle me because I did not “do anything”, I was just there. And then I started to have a better understanding of the gift of presence; the gift of listening; the gift of holding someone when they cry… This gift comes into fuller fruition with the ability to be present to the moment.

Nowadays, I don’t mind silence so much; I don’t feel the need to “fix” things as I used to. I receive the emotions that people share with me with gratitude and hold their pain, and vulnerability and trust as a precious, fragile gift. I receive the emotions that others’ pain foster in me with awe because it means that God gave me a heart and the ability to care deeply. Being able to be present when people go through the tough moments in life is incredibly humbling.

I have been the recipient of the gift of presence recently as I am undergoing tests and am now waiting for the results. God is incredibly present throught people and the words of comfort they give, even when most don't know what a blessing they are.

I think about this gift of presence as we celebrated Advent and the Christmas season. I think about it as I look at this new year ahead of us. I believe there is a longing in all of us for this Presence which offers what the world cannot offer. We sang “O Come, O Come Emmanuel” (one of my favorite Advent hymns). There is a verse that we rarely sing which says, “O come, thou Key of David, come, and open wide our heavenly home. The captive from their prison free, and conquer death’s deep misery.”
This season, but also all year long, we must tell the world that this Presence who transforms, heals and sets people free from their man-made prison and from death is Jesus. We tell the folks we come in contact with through the way we live, through the way we love; through the way we give and through the way we die.

I am not sure where the tradition of making New Year’s resolutions comes from. In years past I used to make the resolution to loose weight (along with half the nation I am sure) and after February I soon gave that up. It will happen. It is happening but it is no longer a New Year’s resolution.
My resolution and prayer this year and every year to come is to become ever more present to people and be more open to the Presence, Jesus. He is the gift of Presence. The One we long for. Amen.

HisSpace.com

2008-12-31T08:51:00.000-08:00

12/28/08 sermon - Luke 2:41-52

You know I am realizing a little more every day that I am getting older and that there are a lot of things around me that I don’t quite get but that I find fascinating nevertheless. A couple of these things are iPods and MP3s (I guess these are the same thing, aren’t they?): I remember buying LPs (33 rpm) and 45s (you know, the vinyl records with a big hole in the middle). I remember when cassette tapes were big and then when they faded away as old dinosaurs when the CDs came out. Now you can’t even give these things away. I guess I was good this year because I got an MP3 player for Christmas! :) I spent some time these past few days charging it and learning how to load songs into it. Pretty cool!

The other thing I find interesting is the phenomenon of websites like MySpace.com and Facebook and Blogs. Somewhere in cyberspace I have a MySpace account. That one was started for me by a youth at a former church I served a couple of years back. I have been invited by several friends to sign into Facebook. So I have one of those too somewhere. The sad part is that I am not sure how to get back on these accounts or how to post anything there. I have a blog now also you know. The good news is that I know where that blog account is and I know how to post texts, and pictures and videos on there too. Whether anybody is looking at my blog is another story. I learned to text from my cell phone this year too. (our youth is looking at me funny by then, like duh...) Communication sure has changed since I was a teen. These are signposts for a relational revolution which I think already started with emails.

Sites like MySpace or Facebook are sites where anyone can post information, pictures, preferences and musing by and about themselves.
On a quick aside, I read in a 12/17/08 Elkhart Truth article that an Australian court has ruled in favor of a mortgage lender using Facebook to contact delinquent payers. I wonder how long it will be before this is legal in America. Makes you think twice about using MySpace or Facebook, doesn’t it?)

While these are designed for people 16 or older, increasing numbers of preteens have been logging on too, declaring or manufacturing their identities for the world to see. On the surface, it seems kind of innocuous. Users can arrange themselves into groups by interest, musical preferences, hobbies, schools and the like. The interactions take place in ways that our kids love and that PC (that would be Pre-Computer – I fall in that category – yikes!) mistrust to varying degrees. On an aside I remember sitting in front of my first computer, an early Apple computer, in business school, holding a floppy diskette and wondering what to do with it. This was 1983 or 84.
Blogs, instant messaging, chat rooms, MySpace and Facebook: In a sense, these have created a virtual community where everyone can participate. The danger we are finding more and more is when predators, like child molestors and pedophiles, enter these sites and pretend to be what they are not. And that is one of the problems some parents and educators have with this. Anyone can participate and not everyone is whom they say they are.

Everyone’s identity is self-generated, which encourages embellishment at the least and outright falsehood at the most. Places like MySpace tap into one of the key tasks of childhood, adolescence and young adulthood, which is discovering one’s identity. Laura Kastner, a Seattle-based adolescent psychologist, says that the popularity of MySpace among young teens “makes perfect sense developmentally because of their burgeoning identity. They can try out different identities and make them up along the way.”

One almost teen we find today in our Scripture text is Jesus and he is growing into his identity and trying to figure things out like any other young person. This is an important passage in the gospel story. At that time, it was laid down by law that every adult male Jew who lived within twenty miles of Jerusalem must attend the Passover feast (The celebration of the Jews being liberated from slavery in Egypt after the Spirit came over the country and killed every first born child of each family, except for the families which had smeared lamb’s blood over their door frame and thus were sparred.) In fact it was the aim of every Jew in all the world at least once in a lifetime to attend that feast. A Jewish boy became a man when he was 12 years old. Then he became a son of the law and had to take the obligations of the law upon him. So at 12 Jesus, for the first time, went to the Passover celebration. Can you imagine what that must have felt like to be in the big city of Jerusalem during Passover for the first time for this country boy? All the sounds and smells and the cheer number of people present. And experiencing the Temple and the sacrifices… This is the only boyhood story of Jesus that is recorded in the canonized (accepted) Scripture. There are some crazy stories found in the Gnostic Gospel of Thomas.
(see http://www.earlychristianwritings.com/infancythomas.html)

When his parents returned home, Jesus lingered behind.
On an aside (I know, another one), I always wondered how come Jesus’ parents did not miss him until they were a day’s travel out of town. But they were not as careless as might first appear to us. Large groups traveled together. Usually the women in a caravan started out much earlier than the men for they traveled more slowly. The men started later and traveled faster and the two sections would not meet until the evening encampment was reached. It was Jesus’ first Passover. No doubt Joseph thought he was with Mary and Mary thought that Jesus was with Joseph.

For the Passover season it was the custom for the Sanhedrin (the High Jewish Court) to meet in public in the Temple court to discuss, in the presence of all who would listen, religious and theological questions. It was there that Mary and Joseph found Jesus. Luke says that he sat among the religious teachers, listening to them and asking questions. (v. 2:46) He is trying to figure who he is and we realize that he has started to find out. When Mary asks, “Son, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been frantic, searching for you everywhere” (v. 48), Jesus answered in the most natural way, as if the whole thing was obvious, “But why did you need to search? Didn’t you know that I must be in my Father’s house?” (v. 49)

What we learn from a 12 year old! Not only was he starting to understand WHO is was but he also understood WHOSE he was early on. This is a good reminder for our children but also for all of us adults: Our real identity, our authentic self are not something we create. Instead, we find our true value and purpose in vital relationship with God. What we’re talking about here is not our need for self-invention or reinvention, it’s about the discovery of self that can be fully realized only through relationship with God through Jesus. It’s when we move from MySpace to HisSpace that we discover who we really are and who we are destined to become.

I got an email invitation a few days ago from a friend inviting me along with others friends to join an online-based book group. As I understand it, the discussions, instead of happening face to face, would happen online. I will have to think about that one for a little while. For one, I am trying to get back to a book group I belonged to but stop attending because of my ordination work and too many moves. My other hesitation is that I spend too much time on the internet and e-mails already. I need more face to face contacts and relationships with people.

I believe that the proliferation of sites like MySpace and Facebook and blogs are an indication that we are a relationship-starved society. Things move too fast. People are too busy and our attempt to connect on-line tells me that people are more lonely and more disconnected than ever before. Families are fragmented and distant (geographically and emotionally). Email can be a great thing but it seems to me that people are also trying to feel connected, to feel a sense of belonging, by forming virtual families and friends. There is something a little sad about that. I believe the local church can fill that void and that hunger for relationship and provide a real community instead of a virtual one.

While I can understand how MySpace and Facebook can be a lot of fun - with proper attention to security risks - it cannot define who or whose we are. Virtual relationships on the web can never replace genuine, face to face, heart to heart relationships, especially with the One who made us and love us more than anybody possibly can.

As we are about to enter a new year, I think we need to ask ourselves who we are and who we will be but most importantly we need to ask ourselves WHOSE we are and WHOSE we will be.

Jesus chose to base his identity on the Father and to follow His Father’s will. Will you?
Amen.

Punching Holes in the Darkness

2008-12-25T17:12:00.000-08:00

Can you wear out a CD by playing it over and over again? There are a couples of songs from the group Casting Crowns' Christmas album that I have played over and over in my car as I am driving here and there. "I heard the bells on Christmas day" is one of them. Check out the video. It is not a new song. Henry W. Longfellow wrote the words after a series of absolutely heart-crushing losses.
Casting Crowns version has touched me at a level that I can't quite put into words. The kind of words, the kind of music which make me feel like singing along at the top of my lungs and drop down on my knees at the same time. The part that says "God is not dead, nor does He sleeps" sends good chills down my spine. A breath of fresh air in my lungs. Do you understand that?
Well, I sang my heart out in the car and I had a ball. Did not care a bit what people might think as I am driving by. I am worshipping and I worship best when I sing.

To me these songs capture what we are celebrating this season of Christmas, but not only this season, I hope, but all year long: The answer to the deepest longing of the human heart; A piercing light in the darkness of this crazy world; A light which lights the most broken corners of our souls... A light that reminds us that we are not alone. Jesus!

This has been an incredible month of Advent/Christmas. I had the priviledge of sitting with people as they died; to sit with the families as they mourned; to officiate at a celebration of life for a former parishioner... There is something incrediby precious and humbling about being allowed in at these times.

God is with us. God is for us. God is in us. Emmanuel! That's the other song I have worshipped with these past few weeks.
I sat and worshipped at a longest night/blue Christmas service offered by a local church just a few days ago. I talked with a couple of people I had never met before the service and they opened up some about what brought them there. We were all linked by losses but in the midst of our pain we wanted to trust/we trusted deep down that there is hope. THERE IS HOPE! God is with us. God is for us. God is in us. Emmanuel!

Our service at the church that I serve was wonderful last night. We are small. We don't have the bells and whistles of other bigger congregations but it did not matter. The service was beautiful in its simplicity. The words of the greatest story ever told resonated in our hearts. The tunes of familiar carols echoed in the sanctuary. We were on holy ground. Our faces glowed by candlelight.

I attended another service at the church my grandmother Dorothy attended when she was alive; the church where I heard Jesus calling me and where I responded in fear and trepidation not knowing what was in store (God knew to give me just enough at a time or I would have ran the other way more than likely); the church where a beloved mentor and friend is serviing. It is a much bigger church and their last evening service was wonderful too. We shared bread and juice. The act of coming forth and holding my hand out to receive the elements as I watch the servers' faces always touches me in a deep place. The taste and texture of the bread and the sweetness of the juice combine on my tongue and remind me that Jesus gave his life for me and he keeps giving me Life. God is with us. God is for us. God is in us. Emmanuel!
As we lit our small candles for candlelight, my pastor friend reminded us that we are not only doing this because it is pretty - And it is beautiful whether 80 people are present or 500 - but we do this as a symbol of the light of Jesus coming to punch holes in the darkness.
I thought, YES! But we are the bearers of Jesus' light. Let's not stop at candles in a sanctury, OK? Let US BE the light of the world. Let the light God has placed in us burst forth out of us in the way we live; the way we love; the way we serve; the way we die!

Maybe this is as simple sometimes as visiting folks. I was tired before our worship service yesterday. I told myself I was going to rest all afternoon after being in the church office in the morning making sure things were ready for the evening and the following Sunday. Instead I found myself trying to get one more thing in. Frankly my heart was not really in it at the beginning.
I visited an elderly couple who are members of our church and shut-ins. Had a fruit basket put together by our missions women for them. They don't have much. Tiny house. Simple folks. We shared communion. My sense of tiredness started to lift from witnessing their sense of contentment despite a lot of health issues and meager resources; their gratitude at being alive despite their struggles overwhelmed me.

My last visit of the day was with an 84 year old man, a friend of my Dad's for the last almost 60 years. A former American GI who landed on the beaches of Normandy. He retired out west but is now back in town to be closer to family. Has a hard time adapting to his new surrounding at a local nursing home. I've known of him since I was 8. He never married. Has no kids. Used to teach German and French at a local military academy before retiring. As I talked with him, his mood lifted. We shared a chocolate from the package I had brought. Good chocolate not the cheap stuff. Savored it. Made it last on our tongue as we reminisced of better times for him. As I was ready to leave after a long talk, he started choking up and his eyes welled up. He held my hand as if he were not going to let it go. Said that his day was finishing better than it had started because of the visit.
A little light in the darkness. God is with us. God is for us. God is in us. Emmanuel!

Growing in Grace

2008-12-08T17:10:00.000-08:00

Philippians 1:3-11; Luke 3:1-6 - This is an abreviated form of the sermon I preached at Bethel UMC on 12-7-08

A couple of verses have been with me all this past week: “Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for him.” These words come out of Luke 3:4 and are originally from Isaiah 40:3 as the prophet predicted the coming of John the Baptist, who in turn announced the coming of Jesus. The other verse, which has been rattling in my brain, is out of Philippians 1:6, Paul’s letter to the Christians of Philippi (northern Greece): “And I am sure that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on that day when Christ Jesus comes back again.” (NLT)

As I look at the frozen and white world outside my study window and ponder on the events of my week, I turn these words in my mind and heart and realize anew several things that I will try to verbalize and share with you:

1 – Do you realize what an incredible story the Bible is? We have a God in whose image we are made. He gave us life. He came in the flesh in Jesus born of a virgin. He lived among us in the flesh. He gave his life for love, a love we will never totally wrap our heads around this side of Heaven. He rose again from the dead and lives again in us through the Spirit. He gave us His Word also so that we would have life abundant and eternal. Does this not just totally blow you away!?

2 - The other thing I realized again, in a new way, is that Jesus came to ordinary people, people like you and me.
Our passage in Luke starts by listing all the important people who were alive at the time John the Baptist was ready to start his prophetic ministry. In a short passage Luke manages to give us panoramic view of who the big wigs were at the time. He mentions the emperor Tiberius, the successor of the emperor Augustus. Luke mentions Pontius Pilate who was in power as Roman governor of Judea from A.D. 25 to A.D. 37. His arrival in Judea was actually the result of the Jews asking Rome for help in removing Archelaus – ruler of Judea, Samaria and Edom - the fourth son of Herod the Great. History remembers Archelaus as a thoroughly bad king. The high priest was at the same time the civil and the religious head of the community. Annas was actually high-priest from A.D. 7 to 14 so at the time he is out of office. His son-in-law, Caiphas, was in office, with Annas still a huge power behind the post.

After naming all these powerful people, we read that the word of God came to John. You remember John, the son of Zechariah the priest and of Elizabeth. Not what you would consider a big shaker and mover in the world. We’re not sure how John heard from God, but we soon find him preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sin in the desert and by the Jordan River.
The Christians in the church at Philippi were not big movers and shakers either but Paul writes to them and about them in a most personal letter. Paul’s letter just overflows with joy and love for those people. You can read more about the church at Philippi in Act 16. Philippi, a Roman colony, was where Paul had planted the first church on European soil, probably around A.D. 50., during his second missionary journey. The joyful and intimate tones of the letter are remarkable when you realize that Paul was under house arrest in Rome, while he awaited trial (4:10-18). This is a “thank-you” letter to the Philippians. They had been sending money to Paul to help defray his living expenses as he was imprisoned. It is also a letter of encouragement for them to continue to grow; for them to beware of false teachers and to urge them to greater unity among themselves.

Prepare the way for the Lord: What does that look like in your life and my life? How do we make straight paths for God to work on our heart? I think the first step is to recognize that you and I need God. We need to come to the realization that we were not meant to do life on our own. In our culture of self-reliant independence, not too many people, including yours truly, like to hear about needing anyone besides ourselves. But you and I cannot follow Jesus if we don’t recognize His lead. Along with that comes a surrendering of control. Again, not a popular concept in our society. The saying goes that if God is your co-pilot, you need to switch seat. The Christian word for this is repentance, turning away from ourselves and what takes precedence before God and turning toward God.

Make straight paths for him…: I think what Isaiah and John the Baptist mean here is that you and I need to look at what is tripping us up. What is preventing us from truly following Jesus? Do we control our tongue or does our tongue control us through gossips? Are you and I behaving in ways that are destructive both for ourselves and others; In ways that grieve the heart of God? Are you and I involved in relationships that are damaging and contrary to God’s will for our lives? Are you and I holding on to stuff that are preventing us from following Jesus? Are you and I treating and loving others like we want to be treated and loved; as Jesus models for us?

The stuff you and I are holding on to is not necessarily material things but it could also be hurt. Maybe we are chewing on the wound someone has inflicted to us long ago and we can’t get past the hurt. Maybe we are holding on to destructive pride. Maybe we refuse to forgive… What are you holding on to?
Jesus says that he came so we would have abundant life and live to the fullest extent. Holding on to stuff or hurts prevents us from experiencing the life God meant for us to have.

Paul writes, “And I am sure that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on that day when Christ Jesus comes back again.” (Phil. 1: 6, NLT). A life that is touched by Jesus should be a transformed life, a life that bears fruit. Galatians 5:22 talks about these fruit. Some of the fruits displayed by growing Christians should be, “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” Are you cringing? I am because I fall short on many of these areas, especially patience. They are called Fruit of the Spirit because you and I cannot reach these on our own. When people look at us - see us live, hear us talk - can they tell we are followers of Jesus? Are we displaying fruit?
Did you notice that out of all the fruit of the Spirit, love is listed first? A mentor was telling me of a blessing he had heard a pastor offer to a group of other pastors a while back. Part of the blessing said, “Love like you have never been hurt.” When he said that I immediately thought of Jesus as he was nailed to that cross, in more pain than I can imagine, and yet he asked his Father to forgive us. You and I are called to love like that and we can’t love like that without Jesus working on our heart on a daily basis and without us being open to the Spirit’s working.

Some of us have said “yes” to Jesus but then like a seed being chocked by weeds, we stopped growing. We stopped bearing fruit. The busyness and worries of this world get the best of us. Our faith gets anemic. For some of us the seeds have grown dormant. Some of us are asleep. Pastor Maxie Dunnam, who was the president of Asbury Seminary in Kentucky, tells of a 3-year old little girl who fell out of bed in the middle of the night. Her cries awaken her mother in the next room and the mother runs hurriedly to her little girl’s room. She gathers her little child in her arms and attempts to kiss away the tears. Finally, she asks her little girl, “Honey, what happened?” Through sniffles and with tears still running down her cheeks, the little girl replies, “Mommy, I guess I fell asleep too close to where I got in.”

That’s the way it is with too many of us Christians. We went to sleep too close to where we got in. This results in lukewarm Christians, at best. We think that after we are justified, after we say “yes” to Jesus then we are home free. We think that we have our fire insurance policy and we’re done. But saying “yes” is the beginning of the journey. When we say we are Christians, followers of Jesus Christ, can people tell? We are called to make a difference in Jesus’ name around us, in this world. Are we? You and I are work in progress for sure but we are to grow in grace through Christ. Growth in grace is attractive. Are you and I attracting people to faith in Jesus and are people indifferent or even repulsed by what they see in us?

A friend was recounting the story of Mary being told by an angel that she would carry and give birth to the Son of God. And that angel told Mary not to be afraid (Luke 2). On an aside, have you noticed that pretty much every time an angel appears in a biblical story, the angel says not to be afraid. I am not certain but this could be to appease the heart and mind of those people who were steeped in the Old Testament belief that if you saw the face of God you would die. Or maybe the angels preface their announcements with “do not be afraid” because what they announce usually means change, big change, but they want to also remind us that we will not face those changes alone.

My friend wondered why we do not seem to see angels anymore; Those angels who talked to Mary and sang to the shepherds to announce the birth of a Savior in Bethlehem. Where have the angels gone? Then my friend asked out loud, “what if you and I are the angels? What if God is waiting on us to deliver His message?”

I don’t know about you but I do have some angels in my life right now helping me negotiate the changes in my life; reminding me of God’s presence. They don’t wear white robes. They don’t have wings or a halo above their heads. No, my angels wear Dockers and sweaters. My angels wear suits and dresses. Do you have angels in your life? Are you an angel in someone else’s life?

“Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for him.” We are waiting for Jesus. If he came today, what would he find? Would he find people who are asleep and bored or people who are fully awake and growing in grace?

Life's Simple Little Pleasures

2008-12-08T15:17:00.000-08:00

My husband Steve and I love cats. We have three: Two that we adopted from shelters and one that adopted us. Fluffy is 15 and she is a Texas cat. She’s done a lot of moving with us. PT is 3 (she looks just like Tacha, our 17 year old cat we had to put to sleep in 2005 because her kidneys were failing and the vet told us that was nothing more to do for her. We did have her anointed by a pastor friend and she lived 9 more months). PT was adopted from the Elkhart shelter and Salem is 4 and she adopted us. Fluffy can be a little cranky but otherwise we have the best dispositionned cats one could ever hope for.

One of the most delicious moments in my week is when I get to sit in my recliner on Sunday afternoon to read or take a nap. Invariably Salem comes to sit on me, or between my feet and she wants to be loved on for a while, or she just sits by me, watches me and purrs. There is something about petting a purring cat that is very soothing and calming.

I said that Salem adopted us and that is true. She showed up 3 years ago when I was serving a church in Granger. She was thin, very hungry and smelled of old garage rags because we found out that she slept in the neighbors’ old barn. After checking with these neighbors and others and finding out that no one was claiming her, we kept her. She is the sweetest cat. We named her Salem because she is all black, except for a little white on her chest and tummy and she “adopted” us a couple weeks before Halloween in 2005. She was also named after the church I served.

I love all our cats but there is a special bond with Salem. She seems to intuitively know when I need company and when I need to be left alone. Besides sitting on the recliner with me, she often comes into my office at home and sits on the desk by my laptop and watches me write. Once in a while she decides that I need a break from working so she purposefully lays on my sermon notes or my Bible and demands to be loved.

I remember a conversation some students and I had with one of our seminary professors several years ago about whether pets were going to Heaven or not. This professor said that it was bad theology to believe that pets would go to Heaven. All the students disagreed. If God created all living things why wouldn’t beloved animals go to Heaven? And if Heaven is Heaven, how can pets (along with Starbucks coffee and Belgian chocolates and good books :) ) not be part of it?

Revelation 5:13 talks about every creature in Heaven and on earth and under the earth and in the sea singing praises to the Lamb and I think Salem and PT and Fluffy will be in the bunch.

Relationships

2008-11-29T10:06:00.001-08:00

I’ve been thinking about relationship a lot lately. More so these past few months than usual. Been thinking about my life and all the people in it. If it weren’t for relationships, I would not be here. A man and a woman came together so that I could be. Right there is the first miracle. Relationships have enabled me to be cared for and survive into adulthood. Relationships are an integral part of who I am and who I am becoming. We are all shaped for better or for worse by relationships.

I am not entirely sure what that is all about and what I am trying to write will probably sound a little messy. It is hard to put words to feelings often. Why I am thinking about all this now?
I think the holiday season has a part in this. Steve and I have just spent the past couple of days with a beloved sister-in-law and niece from Ohio. Steve’s youngest brother could not make it after all because he was on call working for a large national bank as a computer support technical person.
This particular sister-in-law is like a sister to me. We share the same birthday. She is a year younger. We have similar personalities and taste. She works in a helping/caring profession/vocation as a physical/rehab therapist in a nursing home. My whole calling as a pastor deals the complexities and intricacies and pain and joys that relationships generate. We are people persons. We share the love of learning and books. We love the outdoors and hiking. We enjoy museums. Often I start saying something or she does and we realize we were thinking the same thing. It’s really cool.
I think that I have been thinking about relationships because we are not close to any of our families. 5 hours away is the closest. My side of the family is all in France and this time of year is bittersweet because I miss them more than usual.

I have been thinking about relationships because some people around me have lost loved ones recently or are in the process of losing a loved one. I ache for them. I realize anew how precious relationships are and how quickly they can end. I realize anew how much I care about the people in my life and how too often I don’t take enough time to tell them how much I love them and how much they mean to me and how much they have helped make me who I am and who I am becoming. I don’t fully understand all this.

I have been thinking about relationships because I wonder why it is that some people enter your life to stay just briefly. Why is it that some stay for a lifetime and some for just a few months or years or even a few days. I have some people in my life that I don’t want to lose yet I sense that some are slipping away. What does that mean? Is their part in my life over? Is my part is their life done? Is it done for a time or for always? Can I prevent the relationship from fading into the past? I don’t know.

I have been thinking about relationships because a friend just shared recently in a blog that after years of unease, the relationship with one of his sisters has finally become unstuck. It’s taken years of trying to sit down and talk and not being able to somehow. I don’t know the details of all this, I just remember him mentioning this several times in the course of the years that I have come to know him better and the brokenness of the relationship was obviously a source of pain for him. I could empathize with him. I do rejoice with him at this new beginning.

I have been thinking about relationships because I have experienced a renewed relationship of my own with my father over the course of spending several weeks in France this summer. I am not entirely sure how our estrangement started. I think it involved more than the two of us. It’s a whole family system thing. I am not sure what finally got the whole thing unstuck. I had been praying a lot about it. Did I change? Did he change? God had and has a part in it, I am convinced. It’s still a work in progress. So I don’t understand everything that has and is happening but I believe it is good and I am very grateful.

I have been thinking about my relationship with God and how this has become an integral part of me, and my self-concept. I have been thinking that he made us for relationships, with others, with Him. Without these we would be dead physically and spiritually. Without Him I would be more of a mess than I already am sometimes.

I am grateful beyond words this season for all the people in my life. I am not always good at saying things, too often I keep what is in my heart to myself, but I want them to know that I love them and I want to get better at saying it.

Dear God, thank you so much for all the people you sent and keep sending into my life. I don’t understand fully how we are all related, what part we play in each others lives but, help me be mindful of the people you place in my path and help me be a blessing to them. Amen!

Active Waiting

2008-11-29T07:40:00.000-08:00

I was telling someone recently that all of my life, as far back as I could remember I have had a strong tendency to live for the future; to project my life beyond today. As I was saying that, I realized anew, to my dismay, that I am not good at being in the present. I am not good at just being, “smelling the roses” as the saying goes. Being still and enjoying the moment and the people present is often difficult for me. Sometimes I know what events in my life fostered that. Often it is a puzzle to me. But this is not the place to psychoanalyze why this is so for me.
Our western society, and maybe the world in general, is definitely not an encouraging place when comes to being still. The prevalent trend is to go, go, go… produce, produce, produce… buy, buy, buy…
If you and I embrace this message – and often we do – then Advent is a non-issue, the world around us is already in big-time Christmas mode. Just go to Wal-Mart or the mall and you will see that Christmas started in early October if not before, well… the marketers definition of Christmas that is.
As followers of Jesus, the Scripture texts that we read this season are calling us to a very different mode of operation. Instead of go, go, go… they are saying wait, wait, wait… This is a radically counter-cultural message, you know.
Most of us think of waiting as something very passive, something to endure. But there is none of this passivity in Scripture. Those who are waiting (Zechariah, Elizabeth, Mary…) are waiting very actively. Active waiting means to be present fully to the moment, in the conviction that something is happening where you are and that you want to be present to it.

A waiting person is a patient person. Patience is one of the fruit of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:22) I probably have the most growing toward to do. Yet it is one of the most important in terms of growing in Christian maturity. A pastor friend tells me often that life/ministry is not a sprint but a marathon, it’s a long haul, life-long thing. Impatient people are always expecting the real thing to happen somewhere else and therefore want to go elsewhere. The moment becomes empty because some of us have a hard time being fully present in it. But patient people dare to stay where they are. Patient living means to live actively in the present and wait there. We talked about this a couple of weeks ago when we looked at a passage out of Mark 13 (referred to as the little Apocalypse). Jesus was telling his disciples that the Temple they are in awe about will not remain standing. He describes events that very much look like what we are witnessing now around us, wars and rumors of wars and earthquakes and famines… They ask a logical question” “when is this going to happen?” Jesus answers, “Take heed watch; for you do not know when the time will come.” (13:33, RSV) The point is to be awake, alert to the ways in which God will come to us. In a fearful, frazzled time, that exposes us to so much that say to be very afraid, and cover that fear by going, going, gong, buying, buying, buying… Jesus says to actively watch and wait?
So how are we to wait and watch? We watch and we wait open-endedly, not for what we want but for small signs of how God has already come into our midst – the hidden acts of love, the great acts of faith done by people we don’t even know, the daily graces that sustain us. We serve with Christ.
How are we to wait and watch? With hope, with yearning, with expectations that God’s promise is ultimately faithful and true. Whatever form his coming takes, we know that it will be the same Jesus who came to set the prisoners free, to bind up the brokenhearted, to heal the lame, and to give sight to those who cannot see. Because he has already come to us with such mercy, we can sing the Advent song, “Come, Thou Long-Expected Jesus” (UMH 196).

Moving On

2008-11-13T18:35:00.000-08:00

Well, aren’t you glad not to have as much political campaigning going on?
I’ve seen and heard enough mud throwing (oops, I mean political debates) to last me for the next four years. I will be glad if we ever have a politician who refuses to play that game and actually sticks to the issues. I have yet to find one.

I got phone calls from France congratulating me on Obama’s election. That was a little puzzling to me but it seems to me that the general sense in Europe and in the States is that folks are ready for a change and Obama seems to personify that. Even Republican Indiana voted Democrat. This is a historical vote but I hope the historicity of the vote is not based only on race.

One thing I know is that I am not as versed in the American political system as I would like to be. I guess I need to revisit my American government books and review some things that I studied in college years ago. I went to high school in France so we did not study the American political system then obviously. I need to talk more with my politically savy friends.
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Another thing I know is that I try to keep my political opinions to myself and out of the pulpit. I encourage people to register and vote though because this is a freedom and a privilege that can never be taken lightly but unfortunately too often is. I am mindful that people fought and even sometimes died for that privilege. Many people in the world still can’t vote or vote freely. It was not until 1945 that women in France could vote!

Another thing I know is that, as many others, I do not fit neatly in the Republican or Democrat camp. I have voted for people on both sides over the years based on my best understanding of their fitness for the task at hand. I prayed about my vote for the next president; I talked with friends about my thoughts and feelings, etc… It was not an easy decision but I am at peace with my voting decisions.

Now, we need to stop pitting party against party. Be glad we only have two major parties in the U.S. In France there are many more covering the extreme right and left and everything in between and it seems like there are elections for one thing or another all the time.

It is time to be united; to get back on our feet economically; to bring home, in a responsible way, our men and women who are fighting in Irak…

I am sure I am naïve but I want to help leave this world a better place. Jesus calls us to be the salt and light to the world. How do we do this? What does that look like? I think we start right where we are by touching the people around us with the love of Jesus. It means displaying love and mercy and forgiveness and a teachable spirit. I think it means we give our life away in service to others. What would Jesus do?

Stewardship and Sanctifying Grace

2008-11-02T11:22:00.000-08:00

(I wrote this article for our November church newsletter) but wanted to share it in this blog also)

Stewardship and Sanctifying Grace: These are some of the things that have been rattling in my brain for the past several weeks, among many other things.

I think part of the reason for that is because Bethel has been conducting a stewardship campaign that is about to culminate on November 2. This would be today for those reading the church newsletter hot off the press.
According to Webster’s, a steward is “one who manages another’s property or financial affairs, one who administers anything as the agent of another or others.”

We looked at and talked about stewardship and learned or, for some of us, remembered anew that stewardship is much more than just dealing with money. If we believe that we owe God everything that we are and everything that we have, then stewardship is how we handle everything that has been entrusted to us. If that is the case (and I am convinced it is), then stewardship is also an everyday lifestyle not just something we think about a few weeks out of the year, and grudgingly go through because it’s what churches seem to do around October/November each year.

I think another reason I have been thinking about stewardship is because I have been on a low carb diet for a while (or at least trying to be. Do you know there are carbs in just about everything?!) and have lost a decent amount of weight already and I am continuing toward my weight loss goal with the help of some EGH staff/RN. I also exercise more regularly these days because I want to be and remain healthy both of body and mind.

A couple of passages that come to mind, as I am working toward going back to my wedding day girlish figure, are:
1 Corinthians 3:16-17: “Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit lives in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him; for God’s temple is sacred, and you are that temple.”
And verse 6:19, “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”

When Paul is writing this to the folks in the church in Corinth around the year 55 of our era, they are experiencing division, misunderstanding of basic Christian teachings, spiritual arrogance and sexual misconduct…His exhortation still applies to us today.

When I read these verses, I often think “my temple is in need of a facelift! :)” You know, in your 4th decade of life, your body does not react or respond as it did in your 20’s and 30’s. Somehow fat turns into super glue. It just does not budge from your middle area. So I also think these verses mean that we are called to be mindful of how we feed our bodies and our mind, both with physical food – Do we eat healthy and balance meals? - and also spiritual food. Are the things we see and hear and read uplifting to our spirit? Or do we consume spiritual junk food or even toxic food in the form of violence or/and pornography? Things that, instead of edifying and lifting us up, are bringing us down and leaving us stuck at a level where God never meant for us to be. You know how you feel when you eat too much junk food and don’t get enough sleep and don’t spend enough time with God? That “icky” feeling.

I have also been thinking about Sanctifying Grace because I was invited to give a witness of sorts as I was asked to be one of the Spiritual Directors on the upcoming November 6-9 Women’s Emmaus Walk and give the talk on Sanctifying Grace. I previewed my talk to the Emmaus Walk team this past Saturday. God has so transformed my life these past 15 years ! It is a joy and a privilege to talk about that and remember my own walk of 8 years ago.

So what does stewardship have to do with Sanctifying Grace? Is there a relationship between Stewardship and Sanctifying Grace?
I believe there is. Through Sanctifying Grace we slowly become more like Jesus, after we have said “yes” to his call to follow him. God gives us His grace throughout our lifetime to enable us to live as a faithful Christian disciple (Eph. 3:14-19).

When we become more like Jesus, I believe God’s Spirit gives us the desire to be whole, not just spiritually but physically and emotionally also. God draws us into a better stewardship of what we have been given by Him.

There are some lines in a beautiful song (“My Heart, Your Home” by the husband/wife duo known as Watermark) I sang recently which really jumped at me about this whole topic:
Go to http://www.christianitytoday.com/music/artists/watermark.html#interviews if you want to know more about Watermark (their ministry emphasis has been changing)

COME AND MAKE MY HEART YOUR HOME
COME AND BE EVERYTHING I AM AND ALL I KNOW
AND SEARCH ME THROUGH AND THROUGH
‘TIL MY HEART BECOMES A HOME FOR YOU

A HOME FOR YOU, LORD
A HOME FOR YOU, LORD
LET EVERYTHING I DO OPEN UP A DOOR FOR YOU
TO COME THROUGH
AND THAT MY HEART WOULD BE
A PLACE WHERE YOU WANT TO BE

This is a prayer, you know. A prayer that links stewardship and sanctifying grace together, I think. This is my prayer for you and for me. May it be so, with God’s help. Amen!

Becoming

2008-11-01T09:00:00.000-07:00

Psychiatrist M. Scott Peck starts his book “The Road Less Traveled” by saying, “Life is difficult”. Yes indeed. I would add “life together is difficult" but it is part of what makes it interesting and worth living too.

Relationships whether in the Church or in a marriage or a friendship can be trying and testing but I believe this is how we grow, how God shapes us. How else shall we become more like Christ, sanctified, made holy, if we are never subjected to anything challenging? How are we to learn compassion, love, forgiveness unless we are “field tested?”

A friend talked about life together tonight, especially life together as the people of God, the Church. German theologian and pastor Dietrich Bonhoeffer has a whole book about some of this called “Life Together.” I've only read parts of it. I need to read it again in its entirety.

Life together as the people of God is challenging. Nothing new here. Just read the Bible and you realize that life together as the body of Christ, the Church, has never been smooth sailing. Struggles came from within and from without in the form for internal divisions, bickering… Even with Jesus we are still a bunch of goofs after all.
Challenges came from without, from economic hardship, from persecution. Persecution is still a very real issue for some of our brothers and sisters outside the United States. It is hard to imagine someone dying for their faith from the comfort of our lives here in this country. Persecution here in the US is more subtle… We don’t call it persecution. I have asked myself how I would react, what I would say if someone held a gun to my head and asked me to renounce Jesus or die.
In a less dramatic way, would I deny my Lord if that were a requirement to hold a job and survive?
Here we are challenged in other ways. A thousand subtle temptations assail us daily. Will we bow to popular and politically correct things which go contrary to the teachings and ways of Jesus? In some ways, I think we do that anyway, because we are so immersed in our culture, often despite ourselves. Some things which should never be normal and acceptable have become normal and acceptable.

There are amazing blessings in sharing our lives that, in my book, surpass the struggles of being together. My marriage has shaped me in ways that I would never have been shaped if I had not been married to my husband. The good times, the really difficult times...
Living as a follower of Jesus with other followers of Jesus has shaped me in ways I am still trying to grasp. I have been able to open my heart to another human being in ways I had never done before I had committed my life to Jesus. in ways which still surprise me sometimes, in ways which bless me because I have felt safe sharing the deeper things of my life with these couple of people. I trust them with my life. People have opened themselves to me in ways I had not experienced before. That is a precious gift that I hold very dearly. Often I have felt myself to be on Holy Ground. I am who I am and I continue to become through through people and being together.

It is hard to be real. One of my favorite books is “The Velveteen Rabbit” by Margery Williams Bianco. The toy Rabbit asked the old Skin Horse, as they conversed in the nursery:
““What is REAL?” asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. ‘Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?’
‘Real isn’t how you are made,’ said the Skin Horse. It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.’
‘Does it hurt?’ asked the Rabbit.
‘Sometimes,’ said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. ‘When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.’
‘Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,’ he asked, ‘or bit by bit?’
‘it doesn’t happen all at once,’ said the Skin Horse. ‘You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

I have hurt my friends at one time or another, never on purpose. They have hurt me at one time or another, not on purpose, often unknowingly. But we forgive and we keep loving and growing together. It is scary to allow someone to see your heart, way beyond the superficial veneer.

I am still trying to figure out some of my friends. Some don’t open their hearts easily. It’s taken years. I guess I don’t open my heart easily either. Trust must be there. It does take time. God continues to work with us and shapes us and molds us. We are all becoming through His love...

Blogging

2008-10-30T18:19:00.000-07:00

It seems like everybody is blogging these days. I was wondering when I started this a few weeks back why I blog. Doesn’t it seem arrogant to think that anybody would be interested in what I think about whatever topics happen to be on my mind and heart at any given moments? I still don’t know about that. I am not even sure anybody is reading what I am writing, even though I did give out my blog link to some friends but I did realize a couple of things:

1. Blogging helps me think about things. It helps me put my curiosity somewhat into words. But then why not journal in my more traditional paper journal? Well, I do that too some but blogging is not journaling.

2. Some of my friends blog. Some are younger than I am and some are older. And I find myself really enjoying what they write about. I am interested in what they think about and about what is important in their lives because I love these people and care about them. Some of what they write really resonates with me. No matter the topic of their blog I always feel blessed when I have read what they write in their blogs. And that is true of friends that I see and talk with on a fairly regular basis and also for those who are geographically distant. I feel closer to them in some ways. I get to glimpse at a little bit of their heart and in turn, if anybody reads my blog, they see a little piece of my heart too.

3. I think that is the main thing that got me going with blogging, the need to connect and to share. It is not that I think that what is write is brilliant or earth shattering in any way but it is a new way for me to reach out in an attempt to connect with friends and with people I may never meet in person.

4. I think people are starved for connection and meaning and deep relationships. Maybe I am projecting my thoughts and needs onto others but I do believe there are plenty of people out there feeling this way too. The world moves too fast too often. People are too busy. Too many relationships are very superficial. Families are not always geographically close...

5. I hope blogging never replaces face to face or voice to voice contacts though. A blog can't share a cup of coffee with you on a crisp autumn morning. A blog can’t give you a hug when you need one but it is one form of contact.

My hope is that my wonderings might help someone in some way. I leave that up to God.

JOY!

2008-10-22T11:24:00.000-07:00

Sometimes joy breaks through in ways that bless and warm my heart. I’ve been fighting some bug since Monday night that makes me feel like sleeping a lot even after 7-8 hour nights. I have been taking vitamins etc… but I still feel exhausted. I was thinking to myself this morning when I got up, “God I don’t need this, I’ve got too much going on.”

Wednesday morning is when I mentor a couple of first graders, a boy and a girl, at Roosevelt Elementary. I felt so tired when I got up that I almost called to cancel but this is something I am committed to and because I am not coughing and nothing gross is coming out of me, I hope I am not contagious with anything
Mentoring is one of the bright spots in my week. The kids are all smiles when I get there. I get hugs. The little boy in particular is especially affectionate. I start with his classmate and every time he runs to me and says, “I am next, right? You are taking me next, right? You will come and get me.” I smile and reassure him that indeed he is next and that I won’t forget him. I am thinking I might see with his teacher if I can alternate back and forth whom I start with.

“It is better to give than to receive” seems so true in this case. These kids make my day.
Jesus says, “Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” (Matt. 10:39). This seems so counter-intuitive. How can you find something by losing it? This is not the math that we were looking at with my little friends this morning when we were doing additions.

Then something very unexpected happened. The little girl looks at the cross that I wear around my neck and says something that stuns me, “my cousin says that God is dead.” I am taken aback by the statement itself; by the timing of her statement because we are deep in addition homework then and not talking about God. She does not know I am a pastor. The other thing that takes me aback is that this 6 year old would know that the cross I wear is related to God.
I am mentoring at a public school so I think to myself “how do I respond? How do I talk about the resurrection to a 6 year old?” After a few seconds, I say, “O no, God is very much alive. He died so that we would not have to and He loves you very much.” and then I get us back to our additions homework. Whew… Part of me wants very much to tell her more. Part of me knows I can’t really do that in this context nor do I really know how to explain the deep mysteries of the resurrection and faith to a first grader. But I decide after a while that I do know how to do this and that is by showing up week after week and giving her my undivided and caring attention for the time we have together. I trust that God will make the message clear to my little friends in time.

I am still feeling like I am coming down with something but my heart is full. Life is meant to be given away in service to others. There are incredible blessings in that!

STOP IN ORDER TO MOVE FORWARD

2008-10-16T18:55:00.000-07:00

If I remember some economics classes I took years ago in college, there is something called the law of diminishing return. Since my economics books (the ones I kept, are in a box somewhere in the basement, I decided to Google this concept. This is what Wikipedia reads:

In economics, diminishing returns is also called diminishing marginal returns or the law of diminishing returns. According to this relationship, in a production system with fixed and variable inputs (say factory size and labor), beyond some point, each additional unit of variable input yields less and less output. Conversely, producing one more unit of output costs more and more in variable inputs. This concept is also known as the law of increasing relative cost, or law of increasing opportunity cost. Although ostensibly a purely economic concept, diminishing marginal returns also implies a technological relationship. Diminishing marginal returns states that a firm's short run marginal cost curve will eventually increase.

What is true in economics is true in every day life too. There are only so many hours in a day and only so many things you can cram into it. There is a time when we work and work and get less and less done. There comes a time when the cost of working too much negatively affects what should be our most precious relationships. There is a time when not stopping long enough to rest starts affecting our mind and our body. Why do you think God created Sabbath? Why is it that this is a commandment I break way too often?

These past several weeks have been packed with things. Writing sermons, writing articles for the newsletter, visiting and talking with people, counseling sessions, getting a wedding service finalized, working on an Emmaus walk, a stewardship campaign, committee meetings, planning, on the ministry end of things.
Trying to keep up with laundry and some cleaning (OK, don’t look in the corners)… A lot of good things but too many good things. And I realize that it is after 9 pm and I have not really stopped and the past several weeks have been like that. Tuesday, I decided I had enough. I had to stop.

It had been 2 months since I got a haircut. I went to my favorite hair place and I got pampered for over an hour. Decided I wanted to have a little harmless fun so I decided to have a pink hair extension placed in my hair in support of breast cancer awareness month. (go to http://www.cancer.org/).
My husband Steve and I watched a movie that night and it felt great to just sit with one another. That movie really hit home. It’s called “Bucket List” with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. These two men, who in all likelihood should never have met, find themselves united while they fight cancer together. They realize that there are a lot of things that they wanted to do before they died so they write a list and, during a short time of remission, decide to do some of the things on the list. Steve and I talked about that. What would be on our list? Steve said he wanted to work on and drive great hot rods; travel into space…
Some of my dreams would be to travel in the U.S.; going back to France and talk with my Mom and Dad about life; go visit places like the “Mont St. Michel” (St. Michael’s Mount in Normandy) http://mont-saint-michel.monuments-nationaux.fr/en/; go to pastry chef school… Sit on a great sandy beach somewhere sunny and warm and read great books and write about life, about the healing power of God and talk with people…

We talked about that healing power tonight in Bible study. I talked but I did a lot of listening too and I felt so grateful to be with the people in our group, to hear some of their life stories and witnessing again the transforming power of God. An 11 year old neighborhood boy has been joining our group these past few weeks. He also comes to worship most Sundays, all by himself. He lives with his grandma next door to the church but she is not ready to come to worship, she says. Something to talk about. This boy is hungry for God, for affection. A parishioner bought him a new Bible this week and he proudly showed it to us, read with us, asked questions, listened… God is at work doing something good.

Hung out with our youth group last night and listened to a young lady from a local agency talk about the importance of purity and waiting till marriage. It was cool. The kids (oops, young people) told me they like my pink hair. I like it too.
My maternal grandma Dorothy died of breast cancer. My husband Steve’s Mom died of breast cancer. This little streak of pink reminds me of them and that there is hope as long as we don’t give up finding a cure for this and all cancer.

Stop… Listen…

Taking a step back in order to move forward. Be still and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10)
God, help me slow down and see you in new ways each day. Help me to really breathe and to really see and hear and smell and taste the world around me. Help me to live fully. Thank you for the awesome gift of life. Thank you for the amazing people you send in my life.

SOMETHING BETTER IS COMING!

2008-10-13T19:50:00.000-07:00

There is a lot of talk about worry all around us, worry about the economy, about the upcoming election, about this war we don’t seem to know how to get out of and/or end.
We worry about the effect of the economy on our personal finances, with the price of everything going up, we feel the squeeze. For some of us, it is more than a squeeze. It is a genuine crisis. All the pastors I talk with report about more people showing up at their church for help. People come to talk with us about the fact that they are struggling to pay bills. Agencies like Church Community Services, here in Elkhart, Salvation Army, trustees, etc… are getting hit hard. .

As I was driving back from South Bend from a church stewardship meeting tonight, I was listening to Focus on the Family and Dr. James Dobson. He was replaying a 16 year old interview he had had with the late Larry Burkett, who was an authority on business and personal finances with over 50 books to his name. They were discussing a book he had written then titled “The Coming Economic Earthquake” which scenario sounded pretty much like what we see unfolding now.

It would be really easy to fall into despair.

As I was driving back home listening to this program, I remembered some things a pastor friend had shared recently in a sermon based on Rev. 2:8-11 and 2 Cor. 4:7-10, 16-18. Look at Matthew 6:25-34 also. That is one passage I turn to on a regular basis.
As Christians we are not immune to feelings of fears, despair or sadness but my friend reminded me again that with Jesus we have hope. I took notes, you see, because what he said was important even though I had heard what he said before, even preached on it in some form or another, but I needed to hear it again. These are the main points he made (you think you have a long-winded preacher. Got it from him :))

1. Jesus is the First and the Last Word. The Bible says He is the Alpha and the Omega
2. We have a God who is a God of resurrection and New Birth. The tomb was empty, remember? He can bring life into things that seem dead; into relationships which look too broken to be saved...
3. Jesus loves us and died for us. You know the song that sometimes we tend to discount as a simplistic kid song: “Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so.” Guess what? It’s true!
4. Fix your eyes on what is unseen, not just on what is seen. There is a greater reality than what we can see.
5. Keep the conversation going. This means with God, with people who care about us. The tendency most of us have at one time or another when life gets hard and when we hurt, is to disengage and withdraw. We stop coming to church because somehow we have this erroneous notion that church is for people who have their lives together. Are you kidding? If this were true, the church would be empty and frankly, this preacher would not be there either!
6. Turmoil is temporary. Talk with folks who have lived through the depression era or WWII and they tell you, this too shall pass. This does not mean that we don’t care and that things aren’t hard but we need to learn to put things in proper perspective.
7. Now the really good news: SOMETHING BETTER IS COMING! This brings us back to my friend's first point. Jesus is the Alpha and the Omega. The Beginning and the End!

Another thing to focus on when you feel overwhelmed and scared. Another helpful thing from my friend. I have used this when life gets a little too much, when at times I toss and turn in bed because I have a tug o’ war with God about something that is rightly His to handle but that I am trying to hold on to; when I am trying to solve the world’s problems (or it feels this way);

Now close your eyes (after you have read this of course so you know what to do)
Take several deep breaths. Now imagine walking in a forest. You come to a clearing in the woods. It is fall. But there is still a warm/cool crispness in the air. Like the kind of Indian Summer we have now. Most of the leaves are on the ground, they are beautiful red and golden, shimmering. You look around and you can see forever it seems. You hear foot steps behind you, crunching the leaves. You turn around and see someone walking towards you. You look and realize that this is Jesus walking towards you. He is smiling and carrying a duffle bag on his shoulder. He comes closer and closer and stops right in front of you, looks you straight in the eye, still smiling. He puts his bag down and opens the top. “What do you have for me?” he asks. You give him your stuff. He puts it in the bag. “Is that all?” he asks again.
Sometimes I answer yes, at other times I realize there are other things bothering me, so I continue till there is no more. Jesus closes the bag, puts the bag on his shoulder, looks at me and smiles at me one more time, turns and walks away. And you know what? My breathing slows down, my mind and heart are lighter and I fall asleep.

SOMETHING BETTER IS COMING!

Wrestling with God

2008-10-12T13:59:00.000-07:00

Jacob wrestling with God. This text – Genesis 32:22-30 - has been with me these past couple of weeks, after we read it for our Thursday night Disciple 2 class - just rattling in my brain, and in my heart. Touching me. Doing something inside of me. It’s not the first time I’ve read it but this time is different.

Before we find Jacob wrestling with a stranger, who turns out to be God, we find him getting ready to meet his brother Esau. He has not seen him in 20 years. You remember Esau, his twin brother, the first-born -born of Rebekah and Isaac- whose birthright Jacob stole (Gen. 24:19-34). You remember his deception in getting Esau’s blessing also from their dying father Isaac (Gen. 27). Jacob’s name means “deceiver” or “heel-grabber” after all. In anger, Esau had sworn to kill Jacob. Jacob flees to his uncle Laban and he gets a big 20-year dose of his own medicine as he finds himself on the receiving end of deceit and lies at the hand of his now father-in-law Laban (Jacob has married Laban’s daughters Leah and Rachel) as he attends Laban’s flock.

And now 20 years later, God tells Jacob it’s time to go home. The two brothers are about to reunite and Esau is coming to meet Jacob accompanied by 400 men. Jacob is terrified. He and all his family will more than likely get wiped out by morning. That night, Jacob prays, really prays, a deep, remarkably vulnerable prayer. I imagine him down on his knees, prostrated, his face in the dirt. This is no flowery, pretty prayer. It’s raw. It’s coming from his gut. Ever prayed like that?
“O God of my father Abraham, God of my father Isaac, O LORD, who said to me, “Go back to your country and to your relatives, and I will make you prosper, I am unworthy of all the kindness and faithfulness you have shown your servant. I had only my staff when I crossed this Jordan, but now I have become two groups. Save me, I pray, from the hand of my brother Esau, for I am afraid he will come and attack me, and also the mothers with their children. But you have said, ‘I will surely make you prosper and will make your descendants like the sand of the sea, which cannot be counted.” (Gen. 32:9-12)

We talked about this text in our small group. Why was Jacob wrestling? I think a life of deceit and the pain stemming from that had finally caught up with him. It’s a time of testing. Wrestling and testing often happen in the dark stillness, you know; when no one else is around, when we are still enough for things to catch up with us from a day of activity: the pain we have caused, the lies we have told; the poor choices we have made; the unresolved grief… What is causing you restlessness and to toss and turn in bed at night?

Some puzzling things happen during that wrestling match:
- Jacob won’t let go of the stranger. I think Jacob comes to understand that he is dealing with God. His fight is a cry for help. He knows he needs to change and wants to change. This might be his only chance and he is desperate. The prayer above is an indication that God has been working on Jacob’s heart all these years away from home. God had never really been Jacob’s God up to that point but now things are changing. This is a conversion moment. It seems to me that conversion moments often come with pain.

- Jacob continues to hold on and daybreak is coming. The stranger tries to loosen Jacob’s grip on him by dislocating his hip. Jacob will be left with a physical reminder – a limp - of his struggle with God.
- Despite the pain, Jacob does not let go and instead asks God to bless him. Why would you ask a blessing from someone who has just hurt you? God could obviously have done more than cripple Jacob – he could have taken his life. Jacob understands that he has just been the recipient of His mercy and now he seeks God’s blessing and assurance that somehow he would overcome his brother’s wrath. I think this is Jacob’s way of asking to be given the chance to start over; to get a new life, to no longer be known as Jacob, the deceiver, the heel-grabber.

God understands what Jacob is asking and He grants his request. Jacob gets a new name – symbol of his internal change of heart - he now becomes Israel (meaning 'he struggled with God' (and lived) addition mine)

Why am I so moved by this story? I have seen and continue to see Jacob’s story in the people that I serve as a pastor. It is the most remarkable, holy, thing to see someone turn to God.
I have experienced this story, in some ways, in myself too. I can’t quite put the right words to those feelings – it’s a knowing of the heart. Through wrestling and pain, I have seen and felt growth. Through walking in faith, I have been given a new name – beloved, child of God. Yet, scars remain, some still fresh, testify to the wrestling; A reminder that God’s strength is made perfect in my weakness. A reminder that I can’t walk alone. It’s a new kind of strength. One the world does not understand.

Along with St. Paul, I proclaim, “Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

What are you struggling with? Isn’t it time to let go and let God?

It's a Wonderful Life

2008-10-08T18:34:00.000-07:00

I sometimes talk with people who are distraught enough to think that their life does not count for much of anything and that it would have been better if they had never been born. I had such a conversation very recently. When I hear this type of talk, I think of one of my favorite movies: 1946 Frank Capra's "It's a Wonderful Life" with James Stewart. If you have never seen this movie, Oh, you need to. It will warm your heart and renew your faith in human kind.

In this movie, James Stewart plays a big-hearted man who stepped into his father's shoes against his will and continues on the family banking and loan business. Hard economic times hit. Money is misplaced and Stewart is accused of embezzelment. The police is after him and in the middle of a snow storm, he finds himself on a bridge and decides to end it all; decides that his family and everybody else will be better off without him. He jumps but is rescued by a homeless-looking man named Clarence (a second-rate angel in training trying to get his wings) and Clarence grants Stewart's wish of never having been born. Everything in the town changes. There is more misery, more darkness... Clarence shows Stewart his life from childhood till now. Having experienced a world without him, Stewart does realize how many people he has touched for the better because he has been born; how many lives have been positively transformed. Because he was born his younger brother did not die because Stewart rescued him after he had fallen through the ice while playing. Because he was born, the pharmacist he worked for as a boy did not make a terrible mistake in mixing medications and did not end up in jail for murder; because he was born and helped a friend in financial distress, she did not end up a prostitute...

I wonder sometimes what life would be like without me in it. It's hard to imagine. Like it is just as hard to imagine death and my not being on this earth any longer (at least in the current form, I think) and I told my distraught friend about these things.

I told my friend that I believe that we are all seed planters. We don't always see the results of what we plant. I told this person that she is precious, that she is loved by Jesus and by our faith family. Her presence makes a definite positive impact on us. I, for one, am blessed that she is part of our church. I reminded her that God has a purpose for her, for each and everyone of us.

We all get discouraged at one time or another. I do get discouraged and when I do, I look at my life, at my faith journey and realize that I have friends who uphold me when my faith sometimes wavers, who care enough to tell me the truth; a partner who loves me, imperfectly certainly, but loves me, even when I am not all that lovable. I see anew that God loves me and cares for me. He has given me the awesome, hard, scary, fun, task of helping people find Jesus just as others have and continue to help me and walk with me.

If you are discouraged and don't think you matter, reach out to God, find a faith family if you don't already have one; get to know Jesus and the Word God has given us. Give yourself away in service. You will make a difference. You are meant to make a difference!

Everything Changes but there is One constant

2008-10-06T16:58:00.000-07:00

Everything always changes it seems. The seasons, the economy, our jobs, our lives, relationships; us... The weather is turning crisper - great sleeping-with-your-window-open weather; the leaves are turning various shades of golden and red. The markets are on a roller coaster ride. Things that we might have taken for granted as true and secure aren't. Just when I think I have things and people figured out, I realize again that there are many things I don't understand. The older I get the more this last thing seems to be confirmed and I am not that old!
At a gathering of about 2000 pastors, lay delegates and guests on the Indy fairgrounds Saturday, we passed the final vote to become one Indiana Conference of the United Methodist Church where there had been a North and South Indiana Conference. I think it is a good thing. Our Bishop told us that we were meeting in the building which usually holds the sheep exhibit - How appropriate. I am glad they had cleaned out the manure before we got there!
During the gatherine, we were reminded of where we came from and admonished to look ahead.
I remembered my own journey that has enabled me to stand among this crowd, my family of faith, and I gave thanks again for them and for the One who is constant. When life goes nuts, when things move way too fast. Jesus is the rock, the anchor... Always.