A Great Life

Since I have turned 40, a few years ago, I have been in the habit of checking the obituaries in the paper. Not sure what that’s all about. Maybe I want to make sure I am not in there! Actually, I find myself checking for who died, because I know quite a few people in Elkhart and many are elderly. I find also myself checking for who the pastor is performing the service. I often say a breath prayer for them.

It is interesting to read how old people were when they died. I pause when I see that someone died who is younger than me or my age. Reminds me of my own mortality.

I read about what people did in their life, I look to see if they have kids and grandkids.
I find myself somewhat disconcerted when I read that some people, for whatever reason, forgo a funeral service. To read that someone will have no service or memorial and that often cremation will take or as taken place is rather sad. Doesn’t seem quite right to end a life this way.

I find myself wondering about life. How unsettling that a life is summarized in a short column. I start wondering what people will say about me when I die. Maybe I should write something myself to make sure my obituary will read how I want it to read. What would I say? How will I be remembered? Will I be remembered? I wonder since we have no children.

There are some people that somehow you think can never die.
In my head I know that everyone will die one day but there are some people I have known all of your life and somehow I cannot quite imagine them not being there. I think of my parents, who are both now in their late 70’s. Even though we are not close geographically, I cannot imagine my life without them in it. Not hearing their voice on the phone…
John and Helen DeWees were such people. Mom had John as a teacher in HS. John was a red coat at the hospital till he was 95. They both sang at church. John and Helen were the sweetest people you could ever find. They are both gone now.

Another such person was June Deal.I read June’s obituary this week. She was 92. I have heard about June pretty much all of my life. She had a 48 year teaching career mostly at Elkhart High School, which is no more since 1972. She taught when my Mom was a student there in the 1940’s and early 1950’s. I have pictures of June in my Mom’s 1951 senior year book. Incredibly they never changed much. Same hair style. Just got a little smaller and thinner.

June was a member of Trinity UMC since 1936. This is where I met her. She never married, had no biological kids. My Mom, when I called her in France to let her know about June, said that back then women could not marry if they wanted to be teachers. Wow. Almost like going into the priesthood. But June had many adoped kids and grandkids and great-grandkids through her students and their kids and grandkids. She came to my Mom’s 50th and 55th high school reunion a few years back and everybody loved on her.

I had gotten more acquainted with her personally when I joined Trinity years ago before going to seminary and moving on to serve other churches. Got to know her also through CARES (Community Actively Relating to Elkhart Schools), a local mentoring program, which I am a part of. I loved June. She was my kind of woman. Strong, intelligent, funny, well-read, with a passion for learning and education, a passion for helping people.

June was a grand lady. I give thanks for her life and legacy. I hear that Trinity UMC has established a scholarship fund in her name to be used for educational needs. That’s cool.

As we are starting Holy Week, I also give thanks for the gift of salvation which comes to us through Jesus. Because Jesus gave his life, we can have life here now and for eternity and if anyone is welcome in Heaven with Jesus, I would say that June has a spot. I thank God for June.

Faith

There are some things in life that you just hope you never have to do. One of these things happened to me this past Wednesday: I officiated at the funeral of one of our nieces, 21 year old Jennifer in Ohio. The cause of death is still being worked on but it looks like a brain aneurism took her too soon.
I have officiated at several funerals before but they were always for elderly people who were not related to me.
Over 100 people showed up and stayed for her viewing on Tuesday and again for the service on Wednesday. She had been in band in High School and I would bet most of the band was present to honor her. It was just unbelievable how many lives she had touched in her young span of time here on the earth. Jen loved people and she loved horses. As she loved and gave in life so did she in death.
Jen was an organ donor. The doctors were able to use her liver, kidneys and corneas. That is such a comfort to know that she lives on through the recipients of these gifts of life.
The age old questions of how can there be a loving God when things like this happen surfaced. How is pain and suffering able to coexist with love? What kind of explanation can I give? This is not a sin related thing. It just is and I have no explanation. Job comes to mind.
In the end I have to trust that God walks with us in this time of trial and that He cares. I believe, help my unbelief.